Surprise Party
by ChestOfStories
Summary: Kai and Jeremy are trying to get to Bonnie in 1994 prison world to stop her from killing herself on her birthday when Liv interrupts the ritual to take her revenge on Kai for killing Luke in the merge. Fatally wounded and no longer strong enough to do as he was asked, Kai opts to change the rescue plan. / s6 ep13 AU - (written by @KaiJest and @NaturesParamour)
1. Chapter 1

With pain wriggling through his middle and along his spine like a tangle of spooked snakes, Kai was surprised to register the thoughts sweeping around him in a turmoil with no beginning or end. Among all the shreds of coherency, there was one suggesting it was all a set-up. A masterful trap to get rid of him against all odds. And he knew it wasn't true – however much Elena, Damon and Jeremy hated him, none of them would flush Bonnie's last chance down the drain. When he finally set his eyes on Liv – panting and furious, her hair in disarray – he realized it WAS a set-up, after all, but one his dear late brother Luke would refer to as karma. Kai never gave it much thought before. Now it made perfect sense.

Another laugh spilled from him when, unexpectedly, he managed to fling a fork at her neck, and she stumbled back, sliding against the wall. Kai picked up a bottle with the fluid they used for their fireplace, and pain subsided just enough to make space for what he was more used to: the thrill of upcoming death he would inflict. An eye for an eye, or however they say it. He grinned down at his sister, spurting the liquid over her as she tried to turn her face away yelling for him to stop. "It's all coming back now, sis," he informed her. "That charge that goes through your bones at the prospect of watching someone burn to death. I really missed that feeling." He took one of the candles from its holder and held it over her like a priest would a cross against a vampire in one of the black-and-white horror movies they used to like with the siblings of his that were long dead.

"Just kill me, Kai," Liv said, tears trickling down her cheeks, both plea and hatred in her eyes. "You've already killed my best friend. So just do it."

For the first time in his life, Kai felt he was no longer in control of his own body. Even the pain throbbing in his stomach felt as though it was someone else's, and he saw his hand tremble like the flame on the candle it held. Icy dread stroked through his spinal cord. It couldn't be happening.

"Get it over with," Liv said, the candlelight dancing in her darkened eyes like a promise of relief he was no longer certain he would grant.

Soon enough it wasn't just his hand trembling, and his body tensed like an overstrained guitar string. Kai couldn't will any of it. Tears of impotent anger, confusion and something else – that disgusting compassion that burned the brighter the more he stared into his sister's eyes – stung and threatened to spill. He could repeat and yell 'Do it!' to himself all day, and it wasn't going to change squat.

"Motus!" Liv jerked her hand suddenly, and Kai cried out in pain seeping through his shoulder where the fork stabbed. He staggered back, slipped, and fell down, grunting as the agony thrust in all directions from his midsection where her poker first got him. She stood up, once again resembling a goddess of vengeance they learned about at school's mythology – furies, was it? He couldn't tell, nor remember where the hell Jeremy was; his head was swimming. As if from another universe, the voices screamed and laced together. Then Jeremy's arm jerked him up unceremoniously, and he dragged Kai out of the room. Kai could hardly see where. He got a blurry picture once sat on the floor against the kitchen counter, bolts of white-hot lightning shooting through his torso.

Jeremy grabbed his hand, shoved the ascendant in it. "Send me back."

Kai couldn't resist a laugh, though it cost him a terrible throe. "Jeremy, look at me. I'm half dead."

"I have to stop Bonnie," Jeremy said. And Kai saw the same desperate but sharp plea in his stare like he noticed in Liv's earlier.

Bonnie's face, strained with barely contained desperation of the same kind, swept before his inner eyes. Kai nodded. "Okay… okay." He could hardly remember the incantation that helped him focus, and he knew the little of the focus he had was not enough to do what Jeremy asked. But it might just work for what Kai had in mind.

There were running footfalls that burst into the kitchen where they were; there was Kai's name yelled in Liv's voice and something Jeremy cried in return. His hand was off Kai's, and then it was done. A small electrical charge zapped through Kai, stealing his breath for a moment, and he tumbled on the floor in the other kitchen. His vision went dangerously black for a moment while an explosion of fiery suffering wracked his insides. He gasped and tasted blood on the base of his tongue. He scrambled to his feet and dragged himself across the dining room. Bonnie was nowhere to be found.

"Shit, you little witch." He grabbed the edge of the table, coughing up a few drops of blood on its polished dark surface, and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. While he tried to get his breathing in order, he heard it. A faint humming. It could only be one thing.

Her strained coughs broke through the humming of a working engine behind the white garage door. And it was a sea of grass between Kai and that damn door. Sweat rolling down his back and temples, he fixed his eyes on his destination and tried to cross the lawn without falling down. He wouldn't get up if he did. He stumbled a few times, gnashing his teeth at the twinges. Blood was practically pouring out between his fingers pressed to the wound. The last bump he stumbled on nearly sent him headfirst into the concrete wall. He put his hands before him and left two bloody imprints under the switch before slipping down to the ground. It was only the engine running inside. No coughs, anymore.

Kai threw a glance at the switch, knowing he would never get up and reach it. "Please, God," he muttered automatically, like a curse when you hit a finger with a hammer or something, and felt surprised. What would God want to have to do with him? He winced, focusing, and repeated the silly prayer under his breath, raising a hand. He started a little as the door began creeping up with metallic screeches, revealing the smoky garage insides and Bonnie lying on her side at the front tire of Damon's car. "Bonnie," he called, knowing she wouldn't answer. The exhaust seeped into his lungs, stinging and wrenching his windpipe shut. He bent over the ground, coughing violently and thinking he was about to die right here. Breathing in short gasps and coughs, he slowly crawled aside, sucked in a deeper, painful breath and held a hand towards Bonnie. His hand weighed a ton. "Mo… Motus."

Bonnie's body lifted off the floor and flew out of the garage to the center of the lawn, guided by his trembling hand for as long as he could wield it. Her landing wasn't gentle but neither there was more than half a foot between her and the grass.

It felt like an eternity before Kai got to her and slapped her pallid cheeks, calling her name, still tempted to cough until his guts came spilling through his mouth. Finally, she stirred and coughed. He fell back beside her, feeling like a depleted battery consisting of throbbing pain and wetness that was his blood escaping its vessel like rats a sinking ship.


	2. Chapter 2

Ever since Bonnie stepped onto the Gilbert porch and found neither sign of a waiting Damon, nor Elena, any and all hope she harbored vanished into thin air. She'd been strong for Damon and for herself for over four months, fighting to keep them afloat when he sought to give up, refusing to throw away her grandmother's sacrifice. She cried spasmodically for a few hours once she realized they weren't coming to get her and wearily dragged myself back to the Salvatore boarding house. She craved to hole herself up in her dad's place, to take comfort in the familiarity of her childhood home and pass out for the night, but she thought better of it. What if Damon managed to find a way back into the prison world in the middle of the night? She'd been living at the boarding house with him for so long it was only logical he'd look there first. She wanted to make things easier on him and didn't want to stay within this unnerving prison world another minute more than necessary.

Bonnie didn't sleep that night, staring at the parlor ceiling from her place on the couch nearer the front door and where she knew Damon would have no problem locating her. She narrowly registered the plot as she watched a VHS rerun, barely made sense of the words in the books she was flicking through for the umpteenth time that night and by morning—as the sun crept into the living room from the open curtains— she hardly possessed the urge to move. She forced herself to get up off the couch, to recreate her old routine with as much vigor as she could possibly muster and to climb into the shower to wash away the previous day's travel sweat. Damon wouldn't leave her in this world now that he knew she was alive and she didn't doubt for a second—having had a front row seat to his previous attempt to save her—that he was doing everything in his power to get her back. She changed her clothes, applied fresh make-up and did her hair anew in preparation of going home. She made herself comfortable on the couch that day, staring at the front door, straining her ears for any unacquainted sounds of their return – of his return.

She progressively turned on the sound of the TV as the sunlight faded away, one unenthusiastic bar at a time and took to setting in motion their old routine as hunger kicked in. The next day she repeated the process, by the third she'd taken to sleeping upstairs again, and by the fourth she did away with the annoyances she knew bugged Damon. He was such a neat freak. She chuckled to myself in remembrance of his rebuke and his constant need to remind her that he wasn't her maid, that he wouldn't pick up after her and that he didn't want to live in a pigsty. Damon knew how to over exaggerate. She wasn't that bad.

The tenth day she stopped cleaning house altogether, hopeful he'd appear—as he always did—to reprimand her and take her back home. It never happened, and for near on two months she barely strayed from or out of the boardinghouse, only going so far as their convenience store to get juice and other food stuffs.

By February 5 whatever muted optimism she'd been forcing herself to hold onto had been abandoned and given away to sadness, anger and regret. She couldn't think past the ever present voice in her head—one that sounded oddly like Kai—that told her she was never getting out. Damon abandoned her here, he'd given up, there was no solution to getting her out of here and no one else was coming for her. Why would they? She sacrificed herself for this, she made her choice, and willingly threw her life away. Not once, but three times and well before she even became the anchor. She might as well make it a fourth and make it count this time.

Bonnie ambled into the garage with determination, having sealed the windows earlier, towels stuffed against the crack of the inter-leading door to make sure none of the fumes would escape. She gripped the bottle of celebratory scotch she and Damon had preserved for this very reason in one hand, sipping at it intermittently as she did, and turned on Damon's car.

This was all that was left to do. This was as it should have been. What else did she have to return to? An estranged mother that wanted nothing to do with her? College? Would she merely fall back into classes? She knew Caroline would help her, that Caroline would make sure they cram on everything into the wee hours of the morning and that Bonnie would be okay. But what did Bonnie want to be? There was no time for her to think of a future or a silly thing like a career, no time for her to contemplate how Jeremy might feel or to even try to come up with another way to save herself. She had no magic, no future and no ascendant. What more was there?

"Happy Birthday, Bonnie," she congratulated in a contradictory tone, downing off the contents before flinging the bottle across the room angrily. It shattered upon impact with the wall. She eased herself to the cement floor, propping herself against the back wheel, her heart racing in anticipation of death as she gradually inhaled the thick exhaust fumes. She'd been through enough to know what was to come, yet, she still wasn't prepared. She closed her eyes, ignorant to the tears still coursing down her cheeks unchecked, feeling the smoke wrap around her lungs and squeeze painfully. She coughed. And kept coughing.

"You're stronger than all this, baby. Don't give up," a familiar voice said as unconsciousness neared. An image of her grandmother sprung to the forefront. "All is not lost. You can do this. Just hold on a bit longer."

"Grams?" Bonnie whispered, her throat feeling raw, another cough spilling from her lips, her arms falling from around her knees to grip the floor around her. "What the hell am I doing?" she hissed, forcing herself to push away from the looming unconsciousness and pull herself together. She struggled onto all fours, the invisible hand wrapped around her lungs tightening when the extra exertion, making her progress all the harder. She extended a hand before her, still coughing, praying her magic would return and that the door would open. "M—Motus!" she struggled out, putting the last of her breath into the known spell, collapsing into darkness as the overhead motor kicked into gear and the door started to open.

Bonnie coughed as the pressure on her lungs started to fade, her eyelids progressively fluttering open, straining against the sunlight overhead, surprised to find herself outside.

How in the hell did she get here?

She sat up, fighting off grogginess and nausea that threatened to overwhelm her and made a grab for the ground to steady herself. Her hand brushed against something next to her. She looked. She coughed painfully in surprise. Kai? He was the last person she anticipated to ever see here again. She peered around promptly in a search of Damon, expecting to see him lying nearby. He wasn't. She shook it off, taking a few unsteady deep breathes of fresh air to clear my head, and frowned when she noticed the bloodied wound in Kai's abdomen. She impulsively reached out to touch him, to check him and assess the damage. She couldn't have him die on her, not when she didn't know what was going on and was in desperate need of answers. She also wanted to make sure he was real.

"How did you know?" she asked in a strained whisper, referencing her attempted suicide and pushing it aside as easily. "W-Why are you here? How are you here?"


	3. Chapter 3

Kai stared at the clear blue sky above him noticing how the color of it dimmed the more his eyelids yearned to droop. Somewhere in another world, Bonnie was still coughing and gasping for fresh air. His lungs still felt like flayed but he had no stamina to muster a cough or more than a shallow breath, one at a time. He was almost fading when a new twinge shot through his stomach, and he hardly even gathered enough energy for a wince.

"How did you know?" her voice said, muffled as if through a pillow or two.

Kai sucked in a deeper breath, despite the misery his insides turned into. He needed to do this, to stay awake just a little longer. Otherwise, it was all in vain, a big fat nothing he was going to die for.

"W—why are you here?" she went on. "How are you here?"

He groaned, a small sneer creasing his mouth. "Funniest thing ever… came to… bail you out."

This struck Bonnie as ironic and she might have laughed if he didn't appear so sincere. She stared at him in amazement, warm blood coating her hands, a slight tremor coursing through her as she coughed, trying to expel of the damage done to her lungs.

An unexpected cough tore through Kai, and he shuddered at the blast of agony. The blood flavor in his mouth grew richer. He turned to Bonnie, fixing his attention on her in a desperate attempt to leave the pain out of the loop – at least partially. "No time to… explain. Listen to me. I hope you have… the as… ascendant."

Bonnie lowered her hands to the grass and rolled onto her knees. She picked up his shoulder slightly, being careful not to hurt him any further, trying to see where he might have dropped the ascendant. Kai was still talking and becoming more disjointed by the second.

"Now, I don't know if… it'll work, but… I mean, I could only… take it out of others before… never give… so it's a new, but… we gotta try."

"It's not here," Bonnie exclaimed in a feeble murmur, panic setting in once more as she slid her hands underneath him and along the length of his sprawled body, moving to bend over him on all fours to check his other side. What was he talking about? She could scarcely make sense of it. What was new? The ascendant?

"Take my hands… hurry. I've died enough times to… know it's close."

It startled her, making her forget herself for a second. She first grabbed a hold of one hand, then the other as she sat on the backs of her legs, automatically closing her eyes in preparation of his chanting.

Another bout of pain surged through Kai's torso, making him shiver, and he barely noticed her hands in his. "Okay, now…" he closed his eyes to recall the damn words before it all meshed up in his head like a heap of confetti.

Bonnie opened her eyes and squeezed his fingers gently to reassure him she'd done her part, taking note of how cold to the touch he was and how the color faded from his cheeks. Would he be able to get them back? What was he trying to do? She still hadn't quite understood what was going on and hadn't been able to dissect his fragmented words in all our haste.

"Here goes… Essentia magus mea delego… Essentia… magus mea… delego…" His voice faded into a bare whisper as he put all his remaining strength into concentration on the task, pushing the magic towards Bonnie's hot hands clutching his.

Bonnie began to chant with him out of habit and in hopes of strengthening whatever he was casting. She fumbled over the words like a stricken child, coughing alternatingly the more flustered she got, unable to shake the heaviness settled on her chest. She could feel and tell how close she almost came to succeeding in her disastrous attempt.

After a while, he felt something starting. A bit of pricking in his palms as they got warmer, and then as if his conscience was slipping out along with the shreds of stamina.

Bonnie stiffened as the spell began to take physical effect, progressively growing hotter until a low bellyaching heat was surged through her blood system. She knew this sensation well as she had experienced the loss of her power and the return multiple times over the last two years of her life.

Kai clung desperately to the words playing around in his head and his lips moving after them while he could, until it felt like there was nothing there. His head swam and a feeble charge passed through his hands into hers. Before he could perceive whether it was done or not, darkness thickened around him, muffling the senses.

Bonnie stared down at him with silent bafflement once his chanting stopped and the last of his life sputtered from his lips. She kept his hands in hers while she scrutinized his peaceful face, too afraid to let go. What if all this was some twisted nightmare caused by the car's exhaust fumes? She tingled from head to toe, the winds picking up around me as if the seeded power was obeying to the change in ownership and to let her know that there was hope.

Could it be possible?

She gently set his hands on his abdomen, patting at the top of his right hand reflexively in an unspoken form of gratitude. She didn't know why Kai was here or why he came back, but in spite of who he was—and what he did to her—she couldn't be happier to be in contact with another flesh-and-blood human being. The coughs subsided slowly, allowing her to sit and stare at him for a while, patiently waiting for him to wake up. She knew he would come back, he had to—there were questions that needed answering—and he had done so in the past. Why would this time be any different?

Unless somehow, whatever spell he cast to get here, he wasn't expecting to come back?

Tears involuntarily sprung to her eyes, a hand wearily lifted to wipe at her lids before it could fall. All this crying wasn't doing her any good.

"Pull yourself together, Bonnie." She rose off the grass, casting a look in direction of the garage where the Damon's car was still running. She moved to stand at Kai's head and crouched, sliding her hands beneath his jacketed armpits. She inhaled, ignoring the nauseating pain that fisted her heart, and lifted his upper body off the ground, no longer mindful of his fatal wounds as she started to drag him toward the boardinghouse and inside to in front of the fireplace.

She staggered back against the couch to catch her breath once she let him go, rushing toward the kitchen to get a drink of water or juice to wash the petrol taste from her mouth. She headed back to the parlor and took a seat on the couch to watch him, fingers drumming at the glass while she waited. She wanted to shake him, to tell him to hurry up and return to her already. How long had it taken him to come back to life before? She glanced at the clock in the corner of the room impatiently and stood, rubbing her sticky hands against her jeans. She needed to wash his blood from her hands. She lifted the glass off the corner table, finishing it off, and headed out of the room once more to brush her teeth, to dissolve any and all of the fowl taste from her mouth before returning to the parlor a second time.

Kai still wasn't awake.

She crinkled her nose, picking up on a foreign scent, and stared at him across the room.

What if he was starting to decompose?

She sniffed the air as if to try and confirm it and then peered down at her sweater. She lifted it to her nose and inhaled deeply. She needed a shower. She strolled forward and took a seat again to wait another half-hour—getting up to get a second glass of water—and then headed upstairs to rinse off and change clothes. She needed to keep busy, to keep from fearing that, perhaps, with the shift in timeline, he was permanently dead and that hope was once again out of her reach.


	4. Chapter 4

Bonnie thoroughly washed her hair, scrubbing her scalp as if hoping to entirely erase the disastrous garage suicide from her head. She longed for the uncomplicated days, when things were easy, and her former birthday traditions. This was not one she was looking to repeat.

When Bonnie was younger, her grandmother took her to a flea market outside of Mystic Falls borders to hunt for new trinkets—or talismans, as she referred to them—or they spent the day baking cake, pigging out on numerous cookies while watching old movies. Bonnie missed those days and couldn't recall the last time she'd felt that safe.

She clambered out of the shower stall—having decided to make use of the one downstairs—and wrapped one towel around her body and another around her head. She strolled into the hallway and headed toward the archway interleading into the parlor. She stared at Kai's sprawled body, scrutinizing his motionless hands, his face still ashen.

 _What is taking so damned long?_

She'd been waiting near on two hours and Kai _still_ hadn't stirred. Nor had she even taken a second to contemplate what she might have to do if he didn't get up. She knew he seeded her his power for a reason and she could recall the mention of the ascendant. But where was it? Kai took it back to the present and returned without it—or at least it appeared that way—as she hadn't found it on the lawn during her brief search. There was nothing out there, no shattered ascendant, no Damon, and the eclipse had come and gone that day.

Bonnie continued past the parlor, heading for the stairs to the room she'd claimed several months ago. It had been a basic space filled with many old antiques—things the Salvatores collected over the years—and an old four-poster double bed. With Damon's permission, she changed the curtains, got herself a portable radio with a few cassette tapes and some CDs and steadily morphed the space into her own. She couldn't think to stay at her home—not alone—and the boardinghouse presented enough space for the two of them when they needed to go their separate ways for a while. It worked.

A jolt of energy went through Kai's chest, startling him into an abrupt gasp. It felt as though subtle warmth was seeping into his body, slowly, highlighting how stiff he felt. It was a familiar feeling, and not one he particularly enjoyed. He opened his eyes and squinted against the bright light beating from the right. Fire crackled in the hearth, so close he could feel the heat soaking all his right side – the jacket and jeans, but somehow failing to reach his body beneath them.

Grunting, he sat up, rubbing his upper arms for warmth and looking around. "You gotta be kidding me…" A spike of horrid desperation pierced through his chest as he realized it was the Boardinghouse, and, since the last thing he remembered was the hell dimension – that was it. Unless he had dreamt the whole thing with Liv, Jeremy, Bonnie and her—No, he didn't, as he saw all the front of his shirt was covered in dried blood. On the bright side, the wounds were gone.

Bonnie pulled on a fresh pairs of jeans, boots and a white wife beater, quickly towel drying her hair before bounding her way downstairs again. She intended check in on him in passing, not expecting to find anything and preparing to do another sweep of the large garden estate. She could have missed something. The sound of a voice made Bonnie's heart stop temporarily and her cheeks flush with undue gratitude and an inkling of what she recognized to be fear. She should have restrained him or something.

Kai let out a shaky breath, willing the thoughts away, and they just kept pushing: he was back in the very place he couldn't be any longer, and he couldn't die, and there was no way out – this time for sure. In the middle of his inner battle, as he finally got off the floor and wavered a bit, grabbing onto the chair's back for balance, he saw a movement from the corner of his eye and turned.

Bonnie stood frozen in the dining room doorway. Her eyes widened slightly as he met her overwhelmed gaze, a slight tremor racing up her spine, a free hand raised as if to ward him off.

He blinked, afraid for a moment that it was a mere illusion of his overstressed brain. But she was there. Still there. "Now, that's unexpected…" he muttered, stupefied. "I mean, I'm totally happy to see you, but how the hell are you still here? Didn't it work? You didn't get the magic? I was sure it worked."

Bonnie hadn't thought this through—not at all—and a part of her almost acknowledged that it would have been easier if he died. What other explanation was there? He stabbed her, left her to bleed out on his lawn and unexpectedly returned due to a change of heart? To save her? Maybe Damon forced him to do so? But then why could she feel magic humming in her veins?

Despite her having obviously dragged him into the house whereas she could have left him on the lawn where he died, Kai unmistakably read fear and defense all over her. She even raised a hand as though expecting him to lash out at her like a starved vampire probably would. And, despite himself, he felt a prick of hurt at these small details. He missed liking them. He missed it most badly now when he felt too vulnerable, not even sure how it could be possible.

"What are you talking about?" she stammered, unable to deal with his questions and her own racing through her head. She needed to slow things down. She stepped forward, lowering her hand as she did and slid them into her pockets. "You've been out of it for two and a half hours. I was starting to convince myself you might be dead."

"Well, I was," Kai swept a hand over the front of his shirt in indication, scowling at the time she mentioned. "But that's longer than it usually took… And…" He sighed and lowered himself into the chair he stood by, feeling a bit lightheaded, having a harder time getting his thoughts together. "It's weird that I came back at all. I didn't think I could anymore…"

Bonnie remained silent, unsure of what to make of that revelation or what to say. Why would Kai want to come back here willingly? And why did it suddenly feel as if this wasn't the first time he'd entertained that idea? It seemed an odd thing to say.

He glanced up at her, read even more bewilderment on her face and tiredly realized how much she had missed from his story that she now needed to know. Otherwise, her fear and hatred was all he would get. She didn't know any better yet. "I… There's a lot to tell you, since you've been out for even longer than I have now."

She flinched at the callus reminder, temporarily filled with fear, worry and anger. What did that mean? Were her friends okay? And, more importantly: _why was he really here_?

"I mean, sorry, that was, probably, a wrong thing to say. Just… wait." He took a deeper breath, not certain where to start with all of this, and then another question popped up on the top of the pile, blinking red and demanding attention, making him temporarily forget the rest as he stared at her inquiringly. "Why did you stay here? You could've been back with your friends by now. Not that I'll reprimand you for it – no way in hell since I'm happy as can be that you haven't left me here without checking if I'd come back as I expected you would – but… Why?"

Bonnie blinked, her mouth falling opening, a sound akin to a gasp slipping past her lips. What was he talking about? "I couldn't find the ascendant," she said honestly, anticipating his rage or a sardonic comment to wipe away the irregular earnest look on his face.

It made sense: he'd left her in front of his house, half-dead, and she had no idea where he teleported from. There was a bitter aftertaste of disappointment, as well. She would have left him here in a heartbeat had she had the tool for it. Kai expected nothing else, and yet it still stung.

"I—I don't think it travels back with you and you never explained how you got your hands on the previous one." She kept her distance even when his face didn't change, reflecting instead only a little disappointment and then acceptance. "Why are you here? Why would you come back to this place?" she asked, unable to accept his earlier declaration or the evidence running through her veins.

This was all a trick. All some hoax to buy her trust or set her up for something – it had to be.

"What happened to you? Where's Damon?" she continued, irrationally concerned Kai might have done something to him, and in desperate need of confirmation that she hadn't been forgotten.

Her questions – although all very much anticipated – suddenly overwhelmed him, and Kai felt the same weariness again when he didn't know where to start and how to begin. A shiver ran through him, then another, and he became aware of how cold he still was. He threw a glance at the couch where a folded plaid lay, then back at her. "There's just one ascendant here. And Damon's fine. Your friends are fine. Well, more or less…"

 _More or less?_ What the hell did that even mean? Bonnie pushed aside the terrifying thoughts flying around in her head and opened her mouth to make him explain.

He saw her eyes widen and winced, tired in advance to even think about all the explanations he would have to do. "They're fine, really. I just… I feel kinda odd. Like a hangover. It was never like that before."

Bonnie couldn't remember seeing him like that before, either, and she'd succeeded in killing him at least twice. Maybe, there was a problem with the spell he cast to get here? Maybe he'd used too much and it drained him? Or maybe, this was an attempt to weaken her resolve and make her feel something akin to sympathy. He'd done it in the past, plying her with stories of his daddy's neglectful abuse and how estranged from his family he'd felt. She wasn't going to fall for it again.

"I need to drink something hot… like coffee or tea… No, not coffee, should make it steaming black tea. With cognac. A lot of cognac."

Bonnie stared at him, battling her internal hysteria as he jumbled his words like a hyperactive child. Typical Kai. He was going off tangent!

"I need a hot shower and I need to change. Gotta wash that death off me – I see you did that yourself already. So, just… Look, I know how you feel. Your head busting with questions and anxiety – I get it, I really do. And I promise I'll answer anything, just give me a moment. Or two." He rubbed his arms again in an automatic attempt to warm up.

She took note of the soft shade of blue that tinted his lips and the look of genuine weariness written on his face. Where was the usual homicidal pep? Where were the tactless jokes at her expense?

Kai leaned forth in his chair, locking his eyes with hers, hoping she would perceive he was being sincere. "I'll get you back to your friends. I promise. Very soon. And I'll tell you what you wanna know." He got up and started towards the door. "I'll be with you in ten minutes."

Bonnie stiffened in response to his sincere understanding, uncertain of why Kai was making this promise but intrinsically hopeful that he might deliver. No, she chided herself. Stop. Kai is attempting to play you. ALL of this is a scheme. He wants something. He wants to make sure you never leave. When Kai stood—cutting short her troublesome thinking—and headed for the stairwell, she took an automatic step back to give him room. She watched him head upstairs without a word, then picked up her empty glass of water, glad that the pain in her lungs had subsided a while ago. Unfortunately, she couldn't say the same for her nausea, a byproduct of her stupidity she assumed would only be pacified with a good night's sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Bonnie wandered toward the kitchen to grab another glass of water and to turn on the kettle for tea. She paused when she noticed the woodblock and the variety of dicing knives jutting from it. She removed one, taking note of the familiarity it possessed to that of the one Kai thrust into her belly all those weeks ago. She tested the weight in her hands. Kai handed her his magic—gifted it to her on his last leg—but she also knew Kai could take it from her, that if he wanted to, he could drain it and the life right out of her with no more than a quick—and painful—touch. She lifted the rest of the knife collection off the kitchen counter, cradling it in her arms as she walked it over to the open window and tossed it out. It felt good. She repeated the process with all of the Salvatores' utensils, wanting to leave nothing to chance, feeling a little more in control once done. She picked her selected knife off the marble countertop, dropping it into the basin, adding soap and water to hide it, relieved he'd inadvertently given her a chance to do so. She hadn't thought about it before. She cast a look over her shoulder, half expecting him to materialize behind her with a grin. She even waited for a few seconds while stirring his tea and fought the urge to check on him, to make sure he was still up there and hadn't fled.

 _He isn't going anywhere, Bonnie. Chill. He's weak. At least he looks it. You're fine._

She turned back to the kitchen sink mid-pep talk to rinse this weeks' worth of stacked plates and glasses, giving him a few more minutes.

Kai rummaged through Damon's drawers fishing for a change of clothes, then used his in-suite shower, turning it the hottest that he could bear without scolding himself. He wasn't sure he had spent just ten minutes in there as he promised, but he couldn't drag himself out before he felt warm enough. It was too strange, how slow he seemed to be getting into norm. The shower perked him up a bit, but there was still something heavy in him head, as though he hadn't slept two days in a row.

When he zipped up Stefan's hoody over Damon's shirt, his eyes fell on a little table next to the window with a bunch of bottles and decanters on it. He picked a half-full bottle of cognac and went downstairs. Bonnie was doing dishes in the kitchen.

"So, how about that tea?" he asked, granting her with a smile as she turned, and waved the bottle in his hand. "I know firsthand how it sucks to drink alone."

"Way ahead of you," Bonnie responded, gesturing to the mug in the middle of the kitchen island. "I wouldn't say it's warm though. Not anymore." She returned his smile, grabbing two of the freshly rinsed glasses off the drying rack, and headed toward the table in front of the kitchens hearth.

Kai narrowed his eyes in feigned reprimand, set the bottle on the counter and tried the tea. It was warm, but not as hot as he craved it to be.

"That shower must have done you some good," she said as she approached a chair, eying him up and down slowly, taking note of the familiar clothes he was wearing. "You're looking a little heathier and less like the walking dead."

"I do feel better, actually," he said, eyeing the tea, then turned on the kettle again and carried the mug and the bottle to the table.

Bonnie toed the chair away from the side of the dining table, throwing a leg over it to gracelessly take a seat. She was tired and perhaps starting to feel a little hungover herself.

"Aside from having to wear both Salvatores that close to my skin. Yuck." He took a gulp from the mug, poured a generous amount of cognac into it, then sipped. "Mm, that's it. Want some?" He held the bottle out to her.

Bonnie watched and waited for whatever drugs he might have put into the cognac to kick in. _You're losing it, Bonnie_ , she chided herself internally, watching his features for even a hint to the bloodthirsty jester she knew he could be.

 _You're paranoid. What could Kai gain from drugging you?_

She smiled to herself, lightly shaking her head to clear it of the irrational thought before stretching across the table to claim a glass. "How's the tea? I-I err… wasn't sure if you took sugar or not," she added conversationally. She set it down in front of her, tapping at the side of the glass in gesture he pour. The pleasantries were killing her. But what choice did she have until he started talking? Started telling her what she wanted to know.

Kai came up to her to spike her drink as asked. "It's cool. Which I mean in both ways – as in nice and cold at the same time." He gave her a jibing smirk and headed back to turn the kettle off and add some steaming water to her drink. "Now we're talking," he grinned once the temperature was to his liking and brought the mug and bottle to the table, settling down and taking a few swigs, enjoying the warmth spreading inside. Bonnie's eyes boring into him were making him nervous, and he hated it. There was this heap of information he had to throw at her, and that alone was a burden enough, given he was already starting to feel tired. Kai added more cognac in the mug and took a deep breath. "Well… There's overwhelmingly much to tell – or at least it feels that way – I mean, it wears me down just clustered inside my mind. So I better start at the beginning." He took another gulp.

Bonnie braced herself in fear of what he had to say, inhaling softly with nervousness as she raised the glass to her lips to take a gulp.

"After I left you and got back to the world we both call home, I met Damon and Elena right after Liv pulled them out from here – without you – because they all heard I was out, and went running."

Liv pulled them out? Bonnie thought. Did that mean Kai was the reason she didn't make it out the first time? He was the one that sabotaged her freedom and aided in her increasing insanity in this place? She took another gulp, trying to will away the bitter taste in her mouth and the hatred that enclosed around her heart like a steely vice.

"Your Pinky and Brain, Damon and Alaric, attacked me, chained me up – guess where? – on the Mystic Falls' side. With all that travelers' magic soaking the ground. Basically, they gave me a boost I couldn't hope for. And yeah, your home town's back to normal again – I fixed it while getting my fix."

Bonnie took another large gulp at hearing how easy it was to eradicate her former suffering, how easily Kai sucked up what had literally threatened to rip her apart as dozens of dead travelers accosted her. She had hoped—selfishly—that amidst everything that happened, at least that would have planned as a constant reminder about where she was. That was two months ago. With the magical barrier down, had it been that easy for them to forgo attempting to rescue her?

"Then I went to search for my twin sister, Jo. Your pesky friends tried to stop me, knocked me out and kept me that way until the magic seeped out. And then your buddy Damon had a perfect idea to make me help undo the stupid trick your pal Caroline pulled for her mom."

Bonnie stopped drinking at the mention of Caroline's name, her heart skipping a beat with a longing need to see her friend. Bonnie missed her sunny smile and her flamboyant optimism.

"See, her mom has cancer, fourth stage, inoperable. So Caroline decided, what the hey, she's an all-powerful vampire, and her blood's the answer to everything. Well, that went wrong and her mom's cancer went on multiplying by the second."

 _Oh, God._ Bonnie tipped what was left of the brandy onto her tongue, lowering her left leg to the floor, stretching forward to claim the cognac for a moment and to refill my glass.

"So they wanted me to suck the blood's magical effect out of the sheriff – which I did and then got to Jo."

Bonnie recalled the young woman to memory, having seen the many pictures littered around his family home when she hunted for a first aid kit to stave the bleeding. The Parker family was good-looking. And, for a second—while she concentrated on his deceptively handsome face—she pitied the Parker Family and what she imagined he sought to do a second time around.

"When we were about to merge, Luke showed up, knocked her out, and demanded to merge with me instead. He didn't care about the consequences – 'cause, come on, we're not twins – and he said we're still one blood and one age. Technically. I had no other choice at the moment, so I went for it since he insisted. And – as you can see – he lost it. In a way, so did I."

Bonnie noticed that his voice didn't have a hint of facetious or gleeful maliciousness at a job well done. He'd come out on top after all, that's what Kai wanted, and yet his face said otherwise.

"I knew the other twin's traits can be passed to the surviving one. I just wasn't prepared for this whole part of me that drives me nuts." He took another big gulp of cognac. "I was so okay with not being burdened by guilt or remorse or caring for others, and now it's a madhouse inside of me. I feel like all these feelings are busting me from within, like in Alien movie. I mean, I never thought there could be such a storm of overwhelmingly painful feelings attacking you all at once as it happened to me after the merge."

Bonnie tilted her head a tad as if seeing him for the first time, registering how much softer he looked and how genuinely troubled. Kai adorned a similar look of hurt while talking about his father during his thanksgiving farce. The difference this time was that his eyes no longer held that reformatory hardness. That was because of Luke? Or _was_ it Luke? She'd never heard of this kind of magic, then again, she'd never heard of much other than what was taught to her—in spite of her unwillingness—and what she could get out of her grandmothers grimoire and occult books.

"I couldn't do anything, I couldn't shake how terribly badly I felt about Luke, Liv, Jo and what I did to them." Something inside of him was starting to tremble again as he was forced to recollect it, and he gulped down another portion of liquor in hopes of keeping it in check. "Jo didn't want to see me – obviously – and I couldn't find her, so I did the next best stupid thing – wrote a letter and dropped by the boardinghouse before being on my way and out of Mystic Falls. And there they were, Damon and Elena, the nasty couple."

Bonnie chuckled softly in spite of herself, rather relieved to see that Luke hadn't entirely eradicated his tactless sense of humor or that things hadn't changed too much. She needed a little familiarity, however out of sorts. She kept the glass poised against her lower lip, shrugging, conceding a fleeting look of apology for her slight disruption in his story.

"When I explained it all to them, they wanted me to bring you back in return. I pointed out that I couldn't do it without the ascendant which I'd destroyed before the merge."

So it _was_ Kai that ruined my return, she thought, drinking. He _was_ the reason I was stuck here.

"But they kept the parts, so I looked into it. They all wanted to go – even Jeremy came by – and I could only transport us here as ghosts."

A sad smile played upon the corner of her mouth at the mention of Jeremy. She couldn't believe he'd tried to come—that he tried to help her. Did that mean he'd forgiven her? That he hadn't moved on and might still be waiting for her?

"We saw you, you didn't see us. Damon saw the bourbon and freaked out, so they smothered me with demands to get my shit together and just become the freaking almighty God to save you."

They saw me, she thought with sudden panic. They knew what she intended to do. She expelled a soft sigh, her cheeks warming with embarrassment and something akin to guilt. She'd never felt more exposed and more vulnerable than she did at this very second.

"I said I could probably be able to make something more corporeal out of just one of them – which was Jeremy. Elena was strongly against it, mind you. But your boyfriend's just as stubborn if not more."

Bonnie drank once more to keep from saying anything, from asking how much they'd seen and found herself encompassed by an absurd hint of hurt. She understood Elena's misgivings, magic was a fragile balance and Jeremy had been caught in a foul crossfire countless times.

 _Still_.

"When we were in the middle of the spell, Liv came by to kill me. It interrupted the spell, and when Jeremy demanded I repeated it, I was no longer capable of taking us both here. I wasn't sure I could do it myself, so I left him behind to ensure his survival in case I failed. The rest you know. Except… I didn't quite do it for them, and not fully for myself to just make amends. I mean, I wanted to apologize to you more than anything, at that point. But what really sucked was thinking how it sucked for you. I've spent eighteen years here, all alone. I didn't want that for anyone. Not anymore. Especially not for you, Bonnie. You didn't deserve to stay here another day. I thought if I could get through and survive long enough to pass my powers to you, you'd at least would be back home." He looked at her pleadingly. "I don't expect you to just forgive me, or trust me, but I absolutely need you to know how sincerely sorry I am. And to redeem myself at least a little, I'll get you out of here."

The emotions sweeping over her face while he was letting her in on the latest news kept changing quickly, and Kai couldn't tell which flickered among them most often: anger, despise, or understanding he aimed for. While he was forced to relive it all over again and actually express to her – one of those he'd hurt most – how he felt now about things he did, he found the need for her to grant him a snippet of understanding. Cognac did less than he hoped for jamming it. By the end of the story and his confession, his heart was thrashing in his chest so that he almost thought she would hear it. He regarded her, awaiting for a reaction like a sentence.

Bonnie eased her arm off her knee and set the glass upon the table dismissively. "And surprisingly enough, I believe you," she answered, the alcohol having taken away her usual restrain or desire to beat around the bush to battle with her inner musings. She was done trying to figure his motives out, she was done trying to make an enemy of him. All she wanted was to go home, to put this place behind her and be there for one of her best friends in her worst times of need.

Her response startled him with both elation and disbelief. She had drunk a lot, and given she'd had a head start, it might be alcohol talking. As much as Kai wanted to hear exactly that, he couldn't quite believe it was that easy. He hated himself for extra suspicions that stalled him from putting his battled nerves at rest, but could do nothing about it. He was good at reading people, and Bonnie Bennett was a book written half in a foreign language.

"I thought that this birthday was to be my last," she said, "that… I'd never leave this place and that none of my friends would care enough to attempt retrieving me again—" she continued pensively, frowning faintly at her admittance, a hand used to wave off the statement as she stood, brushing it aside as if she hadn't even said it. "And yet here you are. The last person I ever imagined to ever headline the 'save Bonnie' campaign." She peered down at him in passing, a genuine, if not welcome smile curving onto her lips. "I should be thanking you." She ambled around the table toward the CD player, removing the disc within and chose another. She pushed play, feeling slightly invigorated and giddy for what was to come. "So," she said, taking a deep breath as she turned to regard him once more. "When do we go and retrieve our ascendant?"

"Tomorrow, before the eclipse." He poured the remaining liquor into his mug and thought of something. "Or… theoretically, if we have enough magic, we might try to go back, well, whenever."

Bonnie swayed to the music, keeping time with the beat and gradually made her way over to the fridge. She was hungry, more so than she had ever been in the last two months and craving sugar. For a long time everything in the prison world lost its appeal, even something as mundane and ordinary as food. She missed the simplicity of going to drive thru or restaurant to drink a milkshake with a friend, she missed ordering in pizza on a Friday nights when her dad wasn't around and calling Caroline well into the a.m. There was no spontaneity anymore and living off peanut butter, bread and cornflakes got old. She wondered as she peered into the fridge what Kai used to do for himself, he was here for nineteen years, he could cook, did he teach himself that out of boredom or necessity? She thought to ask him, turning away from the fridge when she realized he was talking – more like trying to cast a spell.

He held out a hand to a candle sitting in the center of the table. "Phasmatos incendia."

A flame blinked on the wick, as though it were a distorted hologram struggling to turn on, but failed to ignite.

He repeated the process with the same result and frowned. "That's truly weird. I have magic. I can feel it in me. Why then—" It came back to him how he still woke up from the dead an hour ago, despite his expectations, and his frown deepened as anger bit him. "I can't use it. This damn prison world blocks it." He turned to her. "Tell me you still have what I gave you and it works."

"It's been awhile and I'm slightly—out of it… so, if I scorch you," she joked, sounding fairly serious, afraid she, too, might have the same problem, "it's unintentional." She bent at the waist beside him and leaned down to rest her elbows on the table, forcing herself to concentrate before uttering the essential words. "Phasmatos incendia." Magic sprung forth with effortlessness, a tiny flame instantly taking residence upon the candle's wick, bright and vivid in its execution. "You're right. It is blocking you," she said, confirming his discouraging assessment.

Kai gnashed his teeth and sipped the cognac.

"Seems impossible considering this place was made for you. For your DNA. Or _magical_ essence," she reasoned, shaking her head once more. She didn't even know what to think of it at this time. "Maybe you did something wrong coming here? You were severely injured, maybe giving what remained of your power to me did something… bad," she concluded, unable—for the time being—to think of a better word.

He drank, staring at the candle and thinking over what she said. "DNA… It has to be changed by now, with the merge and all. I am different now, so that has to be a factor. Unless… There's still a part of me that's, well, ME, so…" Realization started to dawn somewhere on the horizon of his mind. He concentrated not to lose the train of thought, which was becoming more of a problem since the alcohol began to kick in. "This place still insists on keeping me in – and that can work if I don't have magic no matter what, even if, in fact, I have it. Therefore I can't use it. That's fucking hilarious." He slammed the empty mug on the table and fisted his hand.

Bonnie reached for some cold meat, jerking in surprise and a smidgen of unanticipated fear as his mug angrily hit the table. She stopped what she was doing to collect myself and subconsciously peered over my shoulder. He was still seated. She berated herself internally, pulling free the sealed Tupperware and wondered over to the table once more.

"Yeah, it's still here – that searing urge to set my father's guts on a slow fire. At least in that I'm me."

Bonnie wasn't sure she was particularly happy about that revelation as that was the same predisposition that had him attack her.

He sucked in a deep breath, let it out, and looked at Bonnie. "At least you have some power. And if it worked to give it to you once, it will again shall we need to. So we can still get out of here." A slow smile tugged at his mouth. "Maybe even now."

Bonnie sat down opposite him again and nodded, reaching for the bottle to refill her glass, using her other hand to lift the lid off the Tupperware. "What if you were to take it from me again?" she asked.

Kai glanced at her with a frown of confused surprise.

Bonnie had to think about it logically. If she were hurt or unable to do the spell, neither of them would get out. "Like you did before," she explained so that he could catch onto her thinking. "Wouldn't that reset your magic use here? I mean… before you left you were able to use it, to steal it from me temporarily… maybe now… the prison's simply reverted you back to your former state." She frowned, uncertain she was even making sense. She plucked a piece of meat from inside the see-through container, lightly gesturing that he help himself and calmly popped it into her mouth. "Perhaps we should try?" she added, holding out her left arm in expectance.

He tore his eyes off her hand holding the meat to give her a probing gaze, then looked at the arm she extended to confirm her suggestion. He was both tempted to try and afraid to see it fail. What would it mean then? Nothing new – he'd depend on her, as well as she'd depend on the magic he carried like a damn container she was eating from. Kai turned to the candle. "Motus."

It shuddered but didn't move much.

"See, I couldn't do even as much in my 'previous state'. So it's not precisely the same, anyhow." He glimpsed at her arm again and sighed. "Maybe I'm just drunk to experiment." He rubbed his forehead tiredly and leaned his head back against the chair, observing the ceiling. "We can try to get out now if you want – go get the ascendant and so on – but I think using my old methods on you at this moment won't be wise. What if I won't be able to give it back?" The horrid prospect of such sent an icy trickle of anxiety through his spine.

"Right. I didn't think of that," she said while nibbling on a second slice of sandwich meat, quietly mulling over his suggestion, a lowly ache taking hold of her heart at the thought of waiting another day. She guessed because the magic was borrowed, if he took it from her—it wouldn't return as hers had in the past.

She glanced toward the kitchen window. It was dark out. That would make our search infinitely harder. "Where is the ascendant? Do I need to do a locator spell? And how can you be certain it's here?"

"Because I left it here?" He smiled and stuffed a piece into his mouth.

Bonnie lifted her glass off the table, bringing it to her lips for a sip as she eased into her previous sitting position, resting it on her knee afterwards. An image of a Damon and the ascendant shattering in his wake as he abruptly teleported home sprang to mind. 'Of course!' she thought with some elation. The caves. Since she'd sent Miss Cuddles back home with her magic and ended up in Oregon, she hadn't bothered to revisit the place. There hadn't been a need. She grimaced. What if the device was smashed into tiny bits and pieces again? How many times would they be able to repair it before it became useless?

"I took my car back here and teleported from the caves. The ascendant must be still there, unless there is another creepy prisoner around who found and stole it." He chuckled and took another slice, then noticed her frown. "Ah, come on. Joke. Seriously. Who'd get in here when the ascendant back home was melted – by yours truly," he gestured at his chest and bit the meat. "God, I'm starving. Must be the whole dying thing. Now that I think about it, it does come back, the hunger and all. Dying is exhausting."

"Is it," she commented, taking a large gulp of her drink, her head instantly fuzzier. There was no way they were going to be able to do this tonight. Her lungs still ached a little bit from the exhaust abuse, she was drunk, and Kai—well, he looked as if he'd been run over by a mac track and dragged a few miles. Her only hope was that it was a temporary look for him.

Kai stuffed two more pieces in his mouth, shooting a glance over his shoulder at the fridge, considering looking for something else and simultaneously feeling too lazy to drag himself all the way across the kitchen. His head was buzzing lightly after their libation, and he craved to stretch on a bed and close his eyes.

Bonnie reached for another slice of sandwich ham, toying with it, nibbling at the corners lazily before speaking up again, not sounding the least bit happy about her decision. "We should probably get an early night and tackle the ascendant come dawn."

He regarded her, a bit surprised and a bit concerned, pondering whether it was a trick. Even if she waited for him to hit the sack and went for the ascendant, it would be a lot of work to put it back together and zap out of here. How much magic did he give her? He was so close to dying and practically depleted with the attempts to transport them all and then Jeremy – it just couldn't be enough for her to go back on her own. Could it? Kai didn't really know, and it scared him a little. On the bright side, she didn't look so hot herself. Dark circles under her tired eyes. He chuckled. "Well, duh, since you keep drinking. Fine. Let's have that date tomorrow, say… six in the morning. Don't be late for the Home-Express. I gotta lie down." He got up and started towards the stairs, then turned back to her for a moment. "Thanks. For listening. And, I guess, for not chopping my head off to make sure I stayed dead – though it wouldn't work – but would be messy. And creepy, for someone like you. Goodnight." He walked out and trotted up the stairs.

Bonnie stared at him over the top of my glass, dumbfounded by his unforeseen courteousness. Typically, Kai didn't care whether a person listened or not, he shared what and when he felt like it and could go on for quite some time. She lowered the glass to the table with a small beholden smile, wrestling with the idea of calling him back as he headed for the stairs again, harboring a sudden desire to thank him for saving her life. She didn't, though – choosing to let him get the rest he wanted and deserved. Saving her might not have been on Kai's priority list of things to do today when he woke, but he'd still done it and he was _still_ here. That mattered.

She finished her cognac, closed her eyes and relaxed her head against the back of the chair, taking pleasure in the fact that – although she was still stuck in this godforsaken prison world – at least she wasn't alone. She could hang in there a few more hours.

She stayed downstairs for a while longer, incapable of closing her eyes for more than a minute at a time, too excited and too anxious about what to expect from the morrow. She eased off her chair and slowly danced around the kitchen to the perfected beat of TLC's CrazySexyCool album. She'd survived a lot this day, and there was only a couple more hours and then she'd be free of this place for good. A celebration that wouldn't hurt. And it didn't. Not until a couple of hours later.


	6. Chapter 6

Bonnie shot up into an automatic sitting position when her alarm went off, banging away at the flat button on the top of the small radio. Nausea hit her immediately, a familiar—and horrid—sensation working its way up her throat. She untangled her legs from the sheets with clumsy haste and ran for my in-suite bathroom. She dropped to her knees on the tiled floor in front of the toilet, spending ten unpleasant minutes bent over the porcelain bowl exorcising the former day's bourbon raid and another ten brushing her teeth once done.

The screeching of the alarm clock yanked Kai out of his dream just before Liv put her poker through his gut for the tenth time. He snapped his eyes open and stared at the ceiling, still feeling the wet, hot blood all over his stomach. He even skimmed a hand over it to make sure the nightmare hadn't oozed into reality in the best traditions of the Elm Street.

It had not.

He pulled his clothes on, splashed some cold water in his face, and went downstairs. The worries of yesterday crept in, whispering that Bonnie wasn't there, anymore. Nor was the ascendant back in the caves. Only they were still here – at least Bonnie, who joined him in the kitchen in fifteen minutes, looking as if she would gladly sleep through the day.

Kai took the big pan with sizzling eggs off the burner and smiled at her. "Morning, sunshine. Let's have our last breakfast here and get the hell out, whatta ya say?" He picked a pitcher with orange juice off the kitchen island. "Get us glasses. Oh, and… where did all the forks go? There's none in the drawers. I'm really loath to eat this with a spoon."

Bonnie didn't expect to see him cooking. "I got rid of them," she answered his question, her cheeks flushing slightly as she removed the two glasses needed. She walked over to him, setting them down before him on the counter. "You'll have to make do with your hand. Or… I could fashion you something with paper and two sticks, though I imagine it would be similar to a spoon," she joked, in high spirits and indifferent of their rocky alliance. Today they were on the same team.

Kai side-eyed her with a jibing squint, heaved a sigh, and took two spoons from the drawer, handing one to her. "I think I shall do us both a huge favor and spare you a few hours of handcrafting some major failure of a cutlery piece."

Bonnie chuckled softly and cut around the egg yolk, using her index finger to push of the egg white onto it, unruffled by the extra hassle. As much as she believed Kai's story, as eager as she was to get out of here, she still wasn't sure she could fully trust him.

"It's all gonna get cold and I cranky," he continued. "I'm cranky when hungry, so you don't want me hungry when my focus's important to you. You're welcome." He sent a spoonful of fried eggs into his mouth, closed his eyes in elation and chewed. The addition of a gulp of juice was heaven. He felt like he hadn't eaten for days. "Oh, it's good."

She watched Kai spoon egg into his mouth, relieved to see that sleep had helped to some extent and that he was looking better. She expelled a soft hem of gratitude, bit by bit feeling the queasiness start to diminish and work away the haze. She hadn't eaten correctly in days and her drinkathon hadn't helped issues. "It is," she chimed in, neglectful of her manners as she virtually inhaled what remained on the plate.

"So tell me," he said, "how come you got rid of the cutlery?"

Bonnie was still chewing, egg yellow messily dribbling down her chin, not at all cooperating with the spoon.

"And when did that awesome idea strike you? Was it some kind of a pact you made with yourself to become a wild woman that eats with her hands and cuts food with her nails?"

She wiped the sticky sauce away with the back of her hand and walked to the sink to wash up. She set the plate down, rinsed her hands beneath the water and washed her face. "Yesterday," she responded after a second's hesitation, patting at her wet hands with the dry-up towel. There was no point in lying or pretending it vanished into thin air without her notice. She turned around to face him, a small smile on her lips. She wasn't at all embarrassed. "I decided—at last minute—that after our last dinner date, that we could do without cutlery or anything remotely pointy."

Kai had to laugh. That made perfect sense, and he had a subtle feeling he had already guessed as much deep down. She had all the right in the world to be paranoid about his presence around her.

Bonnie peered down at her chest to make sure she didn't miss her mouth too much. She wrinkled her nose at the discovery of one or two yellow dots threatening to seep into her shirt. "Dammit," she cursed softly and retrieved a wet cloth to wipe them away. She tossed the rag aside and walked back over to him, picking up her juice. "Luckily, come supper time, we won't have to worry about that issue as I'll be home and ordering in tonight."

"Yeah, hardly I'd have any business being at your place tonight, so you can spare your utensils." Kai finished his breakfast and carried the dishes to the sink. For a moment, he wanted to just leave it there, but then the inclination for order took its power and he quickly washed it up. "Hope you got your bags packed, Bon, 'cause NOW we're going home." He nodded at the door leading out from the dining room, heading for it. The early light was still dim outside. He looked at her over my shoulder. "Got a flashlight? Just in case."

Bonnie picked up the travel bag she'd packed the night before, stuffed with a small medical aid kit, a water bottle and two pieces of fruit. "No," she said and gestured to follow her. She headed for the garage, slipping inside without an issue, ignoring broken glass from the bottle she'd smashed the day before, flipping open a few tool cupboards until she found what she was looking for. She removed two sizable handheld torches, checked that they turned on and tossed him one. "Now we can go," she announced and walked out of the garage onto the gravel driveway, headed for the adjoining forest that lead off the estate and in direction of the caves, a bit disappointed they couldn't cut their hike short and drive straight up to it. That would save a lot of time.

The road to the caves took them a bit longer than Kai recalled from the previous times. It was as though they weren't certain of the surroundings anymore when it was twilight and the dawn was just starting to take hold of the sky. They maneuvered between the trees and bushes in silence, both wondering what they would do if the ascendant was broken beyond repair, or – for whatever impossible reason – was no longer there at all.

But it was. Not in one piece but a few, though it was there. Once they gathered the parts and settled at a big flat boulder to assess the damage, it looked repairable. While they were putting it together, Kai couldn't quite squelch the concern about our magic sharing that they would have to try once the tool was ready.

"Do you still have any power?" he asked, clicking a small wheel into its place by the slightly trembling light of the torch in Bonnie's hand.

"I can feel it," Bonnie responded, helping him hold things in place with one hand, the other casually turned over, an elbow braced upon her knee as if she could somehow study it in the palm of her hand.

Kai cast a surprised glance at her. Wasn't it supposed to fade over the night? As little as he thought he'd passed to her – it should have. Or perhaps they got the way it worked wrong.

"But it also feels as though it's fading, like it's temporary…" Bonnie elaborated, affording no other way of making him understand her meaning. Perhaps it had something to do with his DNA shift and his transference? Or maybe she was just nervous she wouldn't be able to get either of them home. She'd done this twice before. Both times failed.

"It makes sense," he said, gingerly turning the ascendant over to check if he had assembled it right and it would hold until they tried to use it. "You haven't cast much with it last night, so, I suppose, it lingered till now. We'll try to make do with what you have before trying anything else. Well," he looked at her and extended his hand with the ascendant towards her, smiling, "I hope it's working, though there's hardly a way to check before the damn eclipse starts. Which is…" he glanced up at the lightening skies, "some hours away."

Bonnie reached out to take the ascendant from him, trembling slightly as she did, and returned his smile. She was scared, not of him or what he might do – not in this second – but of being stuck here another sixty-three days or worse. "I guess we wait," she replied, easing around in search of a place to make herself comfortable. She refused to leave the cave, quite content to spend the next few hours listening to Kai entertain her with all the modern comparisons he'd endured. He sounded as if he was settling in decently enough. And for the second time since his arrival she was glad for it as it kept her from thinking about their first altercation here and when her hopelessness started.

They settled on the ground among the rocks and talked. Kai did most the talking, relying his first impression of how he found the world when he got back. It felt nice to have her listen – he found she was the one he actually cared to have as a listener. He never thought about it before, and it struck him as both strange and a sort of amazing.

She glanced up through the crack in the rock overhead to where the sun was starting to slid into position and rose off the flat boulder she'd been using as a chair. She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth as she once again sliced into her palm. She hated this part. She raised the wounded hand above the device, dropping a few droplets upon the center, and started chanting, smiling as it started to whir and click into position. She stopped in the middle of the beam, her eyes once more finding their way to the sky before falling on Kai. "You coming?" she asked, my fear temporarily shifting into that of excitement. "I'd hate to accidentally leave you behind, when you came all this way to get me."

He stood before her and felt a subtle genuine smile of appreciation take hold of his mouth. He cupped her hand holding the ascendant as she closed her eyes and began to chant.

"Tu patria nobis deprecor," Bonnie murmured with unrestrained determination. She repeated the sentence – and comparable prayer – over and over, until she could feel every word reverberate through her body and spill from her fingertips.

A gust of wind swept around them, the lights got dimmer and dimmer with every second. Kai felt his chest tighten in anxiety, eyeing her features as she frowned in concentration. His skin broke into goosebumps and he became aware of how chilly the wind was. It was unusual. Something cold and wet touched his cheek, landed on his eyelashes. Felt like… snow?

Bonnie opened her eyes, goosebumps breaking out across her flesh as the wind picked up around them. She stared up through the crack, surprised to see it still dark and the sky colorful.

Kai's breath caught in his throat so abruptly it felt like someone punched him. A trembling throe went through him, right through the middle of his body from the top of his head to the soles of his feet, like the axis of the globe. He gasped in pain, staggering two steps back; the ground wobbled beneath him, and he belatedly felt pain in his knees as he fell on them, thinking he would pass out.

Bonnie was hardly able to register the change and the fact that she could no longer see the eclipse when all of a sudden Kai gasped and staggered away from her. She scanned his face, her eyes wide and seeking external damage. "Kai!" she exclaimed in fright as he dropped to his knees, his face a mask of noticeable agony. She closed the distance been them without thinking and quickly dropped the ascendant beside her. "What's wrong?! What's the matter?" she took his face into her hands, forcing him to stay conscious and to focus on her.

There was a tempest inside his head and body; heavy waves clashing against cliffs, raving within his skull. As though from a few universes away, there was a voice calling his name, asking what was wrong. He saw Bonnie's face, blurred out by the pain he was dipped in, and it seemed he was looking right through her, like she were a ghost. For a frightening moment, he thought she was, and he was still lying on the Salvatore boardinghouse's kitchen floor, bleeding out, while Jeremy shook his shoulder demanding something he could no longer deliver.

When the pain subsided, Kai felt the cold hardness of the rock his back was leaning against. Bonnie's face, pale and worried, hovering before him, her palms cupping his head. He sucked in a deeper breath, gingerly, expecting it to explode with more suffering anywhere in his body, but he felt okay. Weak and shaken, but okay. "What the hell happened?" he muttered, casting a glance at the ascendant, then up, at the crack in the ceiling. The rays of sun, thick and direct, were shining down on the spot where they were supposed to teleport from a moment or so ago, like some giant paint brush stroke a lighter shade through the twilight of the caves.

"I don't know," Bonnie responded in a bemused murmur, releasing her gentle hold on his face to pick up the device and stand. Whatever it was, it was over now. "Are you okay? Can you walk?"

She stared at him a minute longer awaiting his response and then quickly moved to stand beneath the crude hole in the rocky ceiling, peering skyward, bathed in sunlight and freaked to see the eclipse over and done with. Now what? Had we teleported? Did the experience change every time? I know something shifted out there, I'd seen with my own two eyes.

Still concentrating on his breathing, Kai watched her stare up into the hole. Sunlight washed over her like some kind of a biblical blessing they show as a special effect in the movies. Only this time it was the evidence of their curse continuing.

As soon as he thought it, his heart picked up and his chest tightened again with a horrid knowing. He didn't have to check to know, but he extended a hand towards the closest rock and did just the same. "Motus," he mouthed, and shivering was all the rock did.

Bonnie peered at the lifeless device in her hand and glanced in way of their exit. "Let's get out of here," she said, snatching the small backpack off the ground, tucking the device inside.

Kai slowly rose to his feet. "We're still here, Bonnie. Still trapped. Something went wrong, and we gotta find out what and how to fix it before the eclipse tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," she uttered to herself in an inaudible whisper, all power seeping from her legs as she slumped onto the rock. She wanted to cry and rage and scream.

He stilled as the flashes of what he'd seen rushed through his mind, and looked at her. "There was something… really weird happening. Was it just me, or you saw it, too? Was it snowing?"

When she looked at him, her eyes were welling up. And he recognized all the things he had gone through himself on the early stages: exhaustion, despair, pain, horror and a starting apathy. He was sure there were more, but deciphering them all was not on the top of his priority list right now.

Bonnie stared at him in silence, hardly seeing him through her blurry vision. She hadn't found it in her to keep talking, to motivate any kind of debate as to what might have happened, and raised a hand to her eyes, annoyed by her wishy-washy emotions. How easy did she expect this to be? It was a prison, for heck sake!

"I saw it. I mean, I saw something—colors mostly," she answered, at long last, once again averting her attention to the hole, half-expecting it to change again as if on cue. It didn't.

Kai scowled in misunderstanding. He couldn't remember seeing any colors because he majorly saw red and black while writhing in pain.

"At least I think I did." She hardened herself and pushed off from the rock, ignoring the increasing pang of disappointment once again encasing itself around her heart. "And my magic is gone," she commented at random, no longer feeling that comforting tingle, a hand outstretched before her to focus on the ground, to shift the sand around a little. "Motus," she said.

Nothing, not even a wisp of wind or warmth to immolate any kind of casting.

"Let's go," she repeated, no longer feeling optimistic or even happy. She turned on her heels, not bothering to discuss things below as she headed for the man-made exit, straining slightly as she hauled herself up and over rocks, navigating things slowly so she wouldn't break her ankle.

She strode ahead of him, and he let her be alone with her disappointment and, he was sure, all the rest of the emotions he remembered all too well were seething there with it in the common cauldron. There was nothing he could do to ease it; not in the woods.


	7. Chapter 7

Bonnie was exhausted as she emerged from the rocky tunnel, her eyes unconsciously scanning the surrounding forest for other life as she made her way back to the boarding house. What if Kai was wrong? What if during the interchangeable weather change they made it back home?

She practically leapt through the front door of the boarding house, her heart sinking as she took in the recognizable décor she'd gotten to know over the last couple of months. She shrugged the backpack off her shoulders angrily, barely resisting the urge to throw it across the living room or to break the fifty-year-old vase to her left. She gasped softly as strong hands snapped her away from her rising anger and back into reality. She hadn't even heard Kai walk in behind me.

Kai caught up with her in the living room and turned her to him by the shoulder. He didn't like the way she started at his touch, but given what she knew about him he wasn't surprised. He held her by the shoulders as she faced him, and didn't let go even when apprehension was all there to read in her look. "I know how you feel right now – believe me, I had too many tries on my hands to make these feelings my constant companions."

Bonnie stared at her former enemy turned temporary accomplice, craving to lash out, to make him pay for leaving her here to begin with and for getting her hopes up a third time. This was his fault – this was Damon's fault!

"But you right now have more than I've ever had before you and Damon got here: you have hope that is actually solid. I've been out, and I'm back – against all odds – and that means we'll get out of here."

How can he know that for sure? Bonnie thought indignantly. He'd been stuck here for eighteen years and they were both powerless—well, at least she was, his magic happened to be temporary. Which made her wonder how she could fathom relying on it? Tears sprung to her eyes, eradicating any and all of the irrational hatred that seemed to encompass her from head to toe on the walk back. She needed to stop doing this.

"Whatever happened today has an explanation," Kai insisted. "It has to have one. I'm willing to place the first bet on how little magic you had in you. We'll make sure you're loaded full tomorrow and try again. We'll make it. Do you understand me? We WILL make it out." He let go of her shoulders slowly, holding her gaze, and tried a small smile. "At the very least, we have two brains to think it over and come up with as many solutions as we can 'cause one of them will certainly be the right one. Okay?"

Bonnie nodded and gradually relaxed in light of his inspiring pep talk. "Okay," she murmured in uncharacteristic compliance. She dropped the bag to the floor, backing away from the ascendant to make her way to the bar. She needed a stiff drink. No doubt, he did, too. She remained quiet while she poured them drinks, thinking it over, trying to ascertain and remember what they could use to their advantage.

Kai watched her trundle to the table with decanters, put two glasses in front of her and pour the liquor into them. She looked like a girl in a trance. It wore him out just observing her perform this task. She carried the tumblers over to him, handed him one, and settled on an arm of the couch.

"What if we were to find a way to permanently anchor you to this prisoner world?" she asked.

Horror closed its icy hand on Kai's heart – so sudden it was like the very cells of his body reacted before the sense of what she was suggesting reached his mind. He froze with the damn glass in hand like some kind of a fool struck by Medusa's gaze as she busted him stealing one of her treasures, staring at Bonnie, wondering if she was coherent enough.

"To latch this place onto your current DNA?" Bonnie continued. "You'd be up to scratch again, right? Power-wise, I mean. Perhaps we could do this the conventional way. Chanting, ingredients…"

A quiet, nervous laugh of disbelief escaped him, and he took out a half of his shot in one gulp, then dropped on the opposite couch. In spite of how dreadful the idea sounded, he tried to mull it. "I don't think my change is reversible, no matter the methods. But even if it were – what exactly would we achieve with it? You have no magic of your own, and if you reverse me – you got nothing left to cast the spell. And then this splendor," he made a roundabout gesture with my free hand, "becomes our tomb forever with all hope buried and rotten. Forgive my dullness, but I fail to see the point."

"I'm not looking to reverse you. That wouldn't do either of us any good," she said, hoping to make him understand where she was coming from. "We need your magic to get out of here." She walked over to the fireplace and picked a candleholder off the mantel. "As you demonstrated yesterday, you have magic, it's just not in this plane—it's stuck between both worlds." She set the candle down beside him on the small table. "Now, if we could find a way to bring you and your new qualities all the way over, wouldn't that stabilize the power you already have within you and make it useable where we actually need it?"

"It's not stuck between the worlds, Bonnie. It's all in here, in me, I feel it. This world is blocking my use of it. There's a difference. And I have not a slightest idea how to rewire a whole fucking prison world because I have no idea how it's been built, to begin with. My coven crafted it in alliance with other powerful witches, including your grandmother who provided her blood and, I'm sure, a lot of magic support. So, unless you can find any diaries of hers where she describes in detail how a world like this can be created, we can't do shit about how it treats my renewed status."

Bonnie grimaced and focused her attention on the painting hanging on the wall across from her, trying to tend to another option and to keep from throwing something. She was quick to anger lately. She even considered what he said about her grandmother and her possible journals. Maybe she documented what they might need to correct things? Or another note on how to escape this place. What Bonnie knew of magic, if there was a means to create, there was a lot a means to destroy in case something didn't go according to plan. At least most the time.

Kai finished his drink and put the tumbler beside the candleholder. "What we CAN do is try to master the power transfer. It's a little past two, we've got time to practice. Maybe we won't blow it tomorrow, then."

"Alright," she said, ignoring her drink and the weariness worming their way into her psyche. "Where do you want me?"

He rubbed his palms against his thighs absentmindedly, musing on how to go with it, then got up and held his hands to her. "Okay, let's start with simple ways."

When she stood before him and took his hands, Kai closed his eyes, concentrating within himself first, feeling the power circulating like a huge shark trapped in a tank. Then he added his awareness of Bonnie to it, he sensed her with him, her hands in his, and the warmth they shared. It almost started off the siphon power of his, and he had to gently stop himself without losing the focus. When he felt ready, he took a deep breath, released it in a long exhale, and prepared to chant.

"Essentia magus mea delego…" There was a faint pricking in his palms; they got warmer, and Kai had to restrain the pesky power again before repeating the chant. He lowered his voice gradually as he exercised the spell for another five minutes. Nothing new came up: no rush of magic, nothing he felt that could indicate his bidding being done. Finally, he broke it off and asked Bonnie, just in case, "Feel anything?"

"Your hands are a bit clammy," she indicated, offering him a feeble smile. "That's about it." To be safe, however, she turned to regard the lamp poised upon the table next to the couch. "Motus," she said half-heartedly and then extended a hand, repeating the word in hopes of sending it careening into the nearby wall or floor.

Nothing happened.

Kai swallowed hard, staring between the lamp and the girl, trying to get his thoughts together. That was bad. Worse than he was ready for. And why in nine hells? It did work before.

She turned back to him. "What's option two?"

He felt a hot flare of annoyance at how calm she appeared. If there was any time for panic, that looked good enough. Not that it would help, but he was tempted. "Okay," he muttered, considering his options, then gave Bonnie a sharp look. "Blood sharing might help. We need a knife. Think you can remember where you buried them? Because this time I'm surely in no mood for spoons."

"I don't need to think, I know where they are. Wait here. I won't be a sec."

Bonnie walked out, fumbled somewhere in the kitchen while Kai couldn't quite stand on one spot and paced around to get calmer. He needed to focus and the fear – horror of being stuck in the very place he only had managed to escape not too long ago – kept sinking its razor teeth in him, ripping and gnawing.

Bonnie jogged toward the kitchen, forgoing the cutlery outside the window and retrieved the butcher's knife she'd hidden in a bucket beneath the kitchen sink the day before. She returned to the parlor, strolling toward him this time, brandishing the knife to showcase she'd found it. she changed hands upon her approach and raised the knife to her right palm, slicing into it with fluidity, gritting her teeth as she did. "Doing that never gets any easier," she commented, hesitating, if only for a second before extending the knife toward him, handle first as her parents taught her.

Scared of failure and almost smelling it coming, Kai sliced the blade across his left palm, then tossed it on the couch.

"Back to holding my hand?" Bonnie asked, unfurling her bloodied fingers.

He sucked a deep breath and took them. Closed his eyes, concentrated through stinging and fright, uttered the spell in a low voice. Then repeated it. And again, clinging to the words and sounds and the pain and warmth in his palms.

Bonnie closed her eyes, focusing on taking the power from him, of trying to push her energy in a certain direction and feeling utterly useless.

Once Kai got deeper into the chanting, there was something he felt was happening, as though it was a hair away.

 _Not enough… not enough._

He wasn't sure what it meant, but the persistence of the thought broke the concentration, and he felt being pulled out of it. When he took his hands away from hers, he knew something did happen. And that thought – not enough – made sense. Kai was suddenly sure it was a mere trifle of power if any that slipped through their connection. "It's like there's a tube going from me to you and it's too fucking narrow," he shared. "There's gotta be a way to widen it…" He was staring at his bleeding palm, the crimson trickle dropping off the edge of it to the red rug on the floor; it stung and throbbed with heat of a wounded flesh. There was something he was so close to grasping it almost hurt his mind. He pushed, subtly, not to blow the clue away…

Then he raised his eyes to Bonnie inquiringly. "How are you with healing spells? Mending cut wounds with magic? Ever done that before?"

She opened her mouth to tell him she was okay, that it was one of the few things she'd taught herself on account to all the bullshit she had to deal with in the beginning.

Not giving her much time to respond to that, Kai shook his head briefly and nodded toward the couch where the knife lay. "Normal way doesn't seem to work well enough, so we have to recreate the first time." A slight tremor went through his belly at what he was going to suggest, but he was desperate enough to ignore the alarm bells of self-preservation. "You'll have to stab me."

"What?" she parroted dumbly, scowling at the mere thought of his insinuation. "No," she took an involuntary step back. Contrary to belief, she wasn't the blood lusting type. It was one thing killing Kai because she believed him a family-murdering psycho, but it was quite another stabbing him for the sake of doing so. She unfurled her hand, sliding it behind my back to still the tremor that raced through her. "How can you be sure that would even work? And what if it doesn't work and you simply die again? This place is unstable! What if you don't come back?"

He had no answers for her, but the doubts concerning venturing such were fading away quicker than he could have expected a few minutes ago. He stared at her acutely. "Do you wanna stay here forever? With me? Or you're willing to fight for your freedom? Take the damn knife before I change my mind because this crazy idea is all I got."

Bonnie had only spent half a night in Kai's company and some of a day but if she was being truly honest with herself, he wasn't half as bad in the conversational department. It was his sociopathic tendencies in the beginning—when they first met—that had been the thing to put her off. She couldn't trust him then – not that she did now, not completely. She hardly knew him.

As she kept eyeing him like he were a lunatic, Kai softened his tone a bit. "Stab me somewhere I might survive if it'll make you feel better, but we have to try it. Unless you have a magic wand up your sleeve."

As much as Bonnie wanted to go home, to get out of this place, she made no move to take the knife.

"And what will that accomplish exactly?" she asked, unable to see the pattern he was seeking. "Maybe we should try the less manic approach. There must be another… safer and less body damaging option we can try." She took another determined step back and then put distance between us as she headed for my drink, moving her hand from behind her back to pick up her glass. She took a large sip, peering at him over the rim of the glass, waiting for a logical and non-manic explanation while simultaneously grappling for a solution herself.

Kai rolled his eyes and held his hand out to her, showcasing the cut. "This was our less-damaging option. It could have worked – it almost, almost did – but it wasn't enough. And when I came here yesterday, dying, it worked. Do the math. It's the only logical thing to assume right now when other variants I could think of have failed us."

"There is nothing logical about this," Bonnie mumbled into the liquid she was swiftly downing, shaking her head. They'd spent all of ten minutes on working on a solution and the best they could come up with was internal bleeding? She didn't like it. She wouldn't do it. She refused.

Kai turned and picked up the knife. The familiar physical anxiety rushed through his body as every time he took his life before. Seemed like an eternity ago, but right at this moment, it was all too fresh in his memory once again. Torturously fresh. Kai weighed the knife in his hand pensively and looked at Bonnie. "My ability to consume other witches' powers is not a sharing one. I've never learned to give it back, and didn't think I was able to at all. And now that it doesn't work in the slightest when I'm in my strength, I presume it only worked yesterday because I was weakened enough to let it happen."

"Or maybe—" she chipped in as she set her empty glass back down on the table, the words hardly heard as he continued to explain what he thought was the issue.

"My body won't give it up unless we make it. Understand now? And no, I don't know for sure, and there's only one way to find out."

He swallowed and stabbed himself in the side. Pain exploded like a poisonous star in his abdomen, drawing a gasp and a grunt as he yanked the blade out and dropped it on the floor.

"There is—" she cut in once more, her eyes widening as he suddenly stabbed himself. "Are you crazy?!" she gritted out in panic as the knife landed with a soft thud on the rug. She crossed the space once more, wanting to simultaneously punch him in the nose and apply pressure to the wound.

"Take my hands," he uttered, fighting to reclaim the focus for the task. His left side drowned in wet warmth, blood soaking the shirt.

Bonnie hesitated for a second, deciding not to waste his sacrifice, her head reeling to try and remember the healing spells she'd taught herself sometime before. "This is by far your most ridiculous plan," she added for extra measure, gripping his slippery fingers, her eyes closing for the chant.

As soon as Bonnie obeyed, he closed his eyes, grasping at the ache to ground himself in it instead of holding on to the power he had to give up. He chanted more in a whisper, instinctively saving strength.

It wasn't long before the concentrated warmth flooded Bonnie's body and introduced her to the familiarity of a magically encouraged high.

Kai no longer knew how many times he had to repeat the spell before the familiar tingling sensation touched his palms and warmed them up. It was happening, he realized distractedly, but it was still a slow process. His system was indeed struggling to give away its own. Kai tensed his abdominal muscles, intensifying the pain, and felt a faint surge in the transfer. His head was starting to swim the more he dipped into the meditation, maintaining the enforced flow. It seemed his blood ran out quicker the more magic seeped out of him into Bonnie's palms. Soon enough time became irrelevant, and pain softened as if someone pressed a cool compress to the wound for relief. He didn't realize he was going down when the rest of his consciousness snuck out.

Bonnie opened her eyes as his hands became slack and his body swayed precariously away from her. His face looked ashen and scrunched with pain. She jerked her hands from his, grabbing the front of his shirt and his shoulder and forced him down onto the couch before he could pass out on her. She ripped the bottom of his shirt to clear her bloodied workspace, quickly removing her own in order to press the cotton material to his wound.

"Obsecro te reddere spiritus sui," she repeated over and over as she concentrated on slowing down the rapid blood flow, drawing his pain into herself as she'd done for Elena all those years ago. She ignored the nauseating sensation as it shot through her and marveled as his side skinned over, doing away with the evidence that he had carelessly taken a knife to his abdomen or was close to being anemic. Unfortunately, it did nothing for his consciousness. Bonnie expelled a sigh as she sat back on her haunches, studying her hands for a minute, hoping her attempt at rescuing him didn't diminish the sacrifice he'd made.

She pushed off the carpeted floor, heading for the downstairs bathroom to rinse her hands, get him a glass of orange juice to help get his glucose back up and tend to the bout of internal achiness she knew would take a bit of time to subside.


	8. Chapter 8

The lights seemed too bright against Kai's eyelids while he was surfacing from unconsciousness like from a particularly deep dream. It was like having to wake up after just an hour of sleep. His head swam as though the room was wobbling around him, including the couch beneath. Nauseating. His side hurt dully, same way it would had he slept on it for too long in an uncomfortable pose. Too weary to open his eyes and check, he felt it wasn't bleeding anymore. Kai doubted Bonnie had had the time to stuff him with painkillers, so it could only mean she'd gotten the power and used it on him.

He heard her quiet footfalls and smiled meekly, making an effort to grant her a glance. "So, I see my ridiculous plan worked, after all." He grunted subtly, making himself more comfortable, and closed his eyes again. "Despite how sucky the method."

"You got lucky," Bonnie responded, sliding onto the chair opposite him curling her legs beneath her, adorning a freshly chosen Motley Crue tee-shirt, a mug in hand. She sipped her tea. "There is some juice next to you and a ham sandwich. I suggest you finish both. I'm not sure I would be able to do much more if you go anemic or something."

Kai cast a glance at the said snack sitting on the coffee table between the couches, but still felt nauseous to make a move at it. His head was going round and round, and all he could do for himself was spare the hassle.

She sat back and stared at him a moment. He didn't look too bad: pale beyond belief, but his cheeks possessed a small tinge of color. She supposed that was a good sign. "How are you feeling?"

"Shitty, for the most part," he confessed.

"You did stab yourself," she interjected, vowing to make him understand how drastic a measure that truly was and that in spite of his success, she didn't support it.

"Though you did great with sealing the wound, I still have the blood loss to deal with. And all that comes with it, like my head spinning so wildly it makes me wanna puke."

Bonnie set her mug aside, unfolded her legs, and walked over to the medical kit she brought from her bedroom.

Kai wondered why she was so adamant in her refusal to stab him. Given things she might be wanting to avenge, she had missed her chance to pay him back at least a little. That was both endearing and putting him to shame in case she was just that good at suppressing her dark side. Kai was yet to locate it in her, but he was positive there were no people on earth without one. A low laugh escaped him, shortly accompanied by a wince. "If I know what irony is – it's the headline of my fate. So much work to get out of here, so many tries to just quit it for good upon having discovered I couldn't get out of here… and it all comes to this. I can only get out of here if I'm ready to give up my life and let the poor odds decide it. Funny."

"That's the way of Karma," Bonnie said, her voice no longer holding that accusing edge it did before, merely stating fact.

That elicited a chortle. Kai opened his eyes and prepared to tell her how Luke would have loved that comment, but swallowed the words as she approached him with something resembling a thermometer in her hand.

She removed the press on the thermometer and stepped in front of him, taking his head into her hands without question, lightly pressing the slither of plastic to his forehead. She didn't want him to go into cardiac arrest or his temperature to drop any lower. She ignored his look of confusion, tightening her hold on his head so he didn't try to pull himself free and give her a premature read.

He couldn't exactly recoil, anyway, and regarded her with a mix of confusion and growing curiosity. That had to be interesting.

And it was.

"Maybe I should make a run to the hospital," she stated once an alarming number revealed itself on the black band. "You might need a transfusion."

Kai could have laughed really hard if his body didn't know what a strain it was going to be, so the urge remained contained. Eyebrows raised, he observed concern deepening on her countenance.

Bonnie released him, taking a slow step back, tossing the plastic thermometer toward the medical aid kit. She wasn't even sure if it was in dangerous levels. "In fact… yes, I think I will." She was surprised that the idea of seeing him dead a third and fourth time around had lost its appeal. She guessed that was what happened when human interaction was at minimum. "You eat something. And try to get some rest, and I'll be back in fifteen."

With an uncontrollable smile of entertained incredulity tugging at the corners of his mouth, Kai followed her with his eyes as she walked around the couch seriously planning on making that trip to the hospital. It was like a surreal joke. Something you only see in half-coherent dreams you can't recollect upon awakening.

She paused in her tracks. "I don't suppose you know your blood type?"

Then Kai couldn't fight it any longer, and he laughed. It started in his belly, making him grimace at the phantom pains in his side, but he couldn't stop once he started. He couldn't tell which it was to a greater extent: diverted or nervous.

"Oh, Bonnie," he groaned, snickering, "really? Transfusion? Sure, why the hell not. Mere stab was too boring. Gee, you're killing me."

Bonnie arched her brows suspiciously, trying to figure out what he found so funny, unable to stave her irritation at his amusement.

He pressed a hand to his side, shaking in soundless laughter. "You're literally killing me. I mean, I should probably allow it just to see how you go about it so I could die of laughter – which would probably be a merciful end compared to what you're gonna do to me when you get your hands on blood packs and needles." Talking while laughing exhausted him, and his head span dangerously, but the remnants of snicker still took their last stand. Kai felt as if he were high and going into OD. "Of course I don't know my blood type. You might as well finish me off right away in a simpler and more certain manner… By the way, where's that knife?" He raised his head off the cushion as if searching for the blade, and another bout of laughter burst through, luckily short, pinning his head back down. "Give it to me. I'll do it myself."

Bonnie was past laughter while she tried to decide whether he was high on his post-stab endorphins or he failed to understand the concept of a transfusion. She wasn't trying to kill him. She was trying to make sure he wouldn't die – not again. "Try and rest a little while longer," she said with an exasperated exhale, sparing no mind to his unwitting sarcasm. "I'll check in on you in a few minutes."

The cramps in his side due to laughter were getting bad now, and Kai was lying with his eyes closed, trying to get his breathing under control. He said nothing and heard her walk away. He was hoping it wasn't the hospital she headed to. He didn't hear the front door opening any time after, and in a bit, he drifted off.

Bonnie registered the strain on his face as she walked from the parlor and headed for the Salvatore library. She had spent enough time in there to know there were a few at-home-remedy books available. She returned to the living room thirty minutes later, a fresh bottle of water in hand, along with a small bowl of shredded tuna. Both were set down next to him.

"You'll have to make due with a spoon for now, I haven't dug the rest of the cutlery out of the yard yet," she said, strolling over to the couch she claimed earlier to retrieve her cold tea.

Kai pried his eyes open and glanced at the coffee table where she sat a bottle with water and a bowl with something to eat. Seemed like tuna. His stomach churned rebelliously, and he reached for the bottle.

"Now that I have your magic again, what do we do?" Bonnie asked. "This only solves part of the problem. I don't know what happened out there…" She waited for him to catch on and focus, recalling how cold it had gotten and those colorful lights that shone overhead. "We can't be certain it'll actually work tomorrow." She watched him drink and leisurely sipped at her cold tea, frustrated by how weak he looked. She should have taken more of his pain.

Kai emptied half the bottle in a few large gulps and sucked in a deep breath, letting the water settle inside him. "We can't check it now, either. So, it's only tomorrow that we see if it works or not." He took a couple more gulps and screwed the cap back on. "What CAN be a problem tomorrow is how shitty I might be feeling."

Bonnie blinked, raising a brow as if to enquire what he was referring to, a little lost in her own thoughts. He expected to be like this for a while? This is what you get for impulse!

"It was a mistake to keep me alive. It might have been a better choice to off me and let it reset, as usual." Kai peered at her with a weak smirk. "So, where's that knife, again?"

Bonnie stared at him with an offended disbelief. "You're kidding, right?" She wasn't sure if she was picking up on his humor or sarcasm. Bonnie couldn't tell right now. "No," she answered without skipping a beat. "Eat, keep your water intake up and get some rest. I've checked the Salvatore's home remedy books and they all suggest that." Okay, she only managed to use one book for research, but it was thick and detailed and worth a shot. Kai didn't know otherwise. "Your low sugar is making you green behind the gills. We don't have to go about pulling a Dahmer to correct that. Besides, what else is there to do today?"

Kai heaved a sigh, threw a testing glance at the tuna and winced internally. "I've never been hot on stuffing my face when feeling crappy," he informed her and unscrewed the bottle's cap for another few gulps. "And why not just make it simpler for both of us? We know I'll come back in a better shape, so why drawing it all out? What if I'm not at my full power tomorrow when we have to repeat the damn transfer? What are you gonna do then? The only reason this world glitched on us might have been your lack of magic. Therefore, we gotta make sure you're filled up real good tomorrow when the show starts." He put the bottle back on the table and stared at her sharply.

"What are you trying to say? That you're going to off yourself until I'm juiced up to the hilt and overloaded with power?" Bonnie wasn't going to take this option again. "I know you must be feeling like shit," she added as she stood, mildly offended that the water hadn't done anything to rectify his complexion yet. "But all the books say you need to eat meat. Be it chicken—which I can cook up if the tuna isn't doing it for you… or something like a steak."

Kai thought for a moment about that steak option and didn't really know for sure if he could keep it down if he ate some. He was thirsty again, and reached for the bottle.

"We've still time to get you back up to speed the natural non-dead for a couple of hour's way. Do you remember how long it took you to come back last time? Because I do and it was far longer than when you last happened to catch up to me. What if this time you don't wake up period? You said yourself. This place isn't made for you anymore – not this version of you. So, let's stick to the basic… sane human ideas… and if after that, it still doesn't work. I'll gladly string up and use you as my own bloody piñata." She sounded anything but enthusiastic about the prospect.

Kai had to chuckle and almost choked on the last gulp of water he took. Desperate times called for desperate measures – fair enough – but serving as a piñata was not in his plans.

"So… that tuna going to do… or should I cook you up something else?"

Kai discarded the empty plastic bottle on the table next to untouched tuna and looked at her tiredly. "That was a hell of a long speech and I almost passed out three times. So – while I feel that shitty and weak – I'll keep it simple. No, tuna's no good. I'm not your cat to feed me Whiskas."

Bonnie smiled to herself subtly, and walked over to the small side table to inspect what he claimed to be cat food. She picked up the bowl, dipping a finger into it to scoop the meat onto her index finger, lazily tasting it for herself. She liked it.

"As for what I had in mind – God, I wonder how many times I should explain it to you, but I will – once you bring me something decent to eat – something I won't wanna puke out." He leaned his head back on the cushion, closing his eyes to spare energy.

"Steak it is," Bonnie said, popping the oily finger into her mouth to suck the residue fish from the tip. "In the meantime, get some rest and I'll bring you some more water."

Kai made a half-coherent sound of acknowledgment, lured by the relaxation of the upcoming slumber that had already started encompassing him as soon as his eyes closed.

She walked out of the living room and into the kitchen, quickly tossing a steak into the microwave to defrost it before oiling up a frying pan. It wasn't long before both were left to heat up on the stove and she was making her back to the parlor to check on Kai and deliver him some more water. She set the bottle down beside his untouched orange juice. He seemed asleep. She didn't linger long, making another journey back to the stove to turn his meat, and then headed outside to dig up a knife and a fork.

She returned to Kai half an hour later, the steak poised in the middle of the plate without any other dressings or extras. She wanted to make sure he ate this first before she attempted anything else. "Here," she said, extending the offering toward him to take. "I hope you like well done, you don't seem the type for medium rare."

Kai stirred. "You'd be surprised," he muttered in a voice that sounded as though it was getting rusty, and forced his eyes to open and scan the plate she held for him.

Bonnie instinctively reached out to help him sit up, stopping when she realized what she was doing, and quickly handed over the plate. She was being so damned mother-hennish. A lot of which she guessed had to do with the fact that she was missing Caroline—some sort of psychological projection—and the fear of being left alone again. Bonnie hated to admit it, but as of right now—at this moment—Kai was all she had in the world.

Slowly, Kai changed his position to half sitting and took the plate with utensils. It smelled nice, but he didn't feel like eating. He shot an uncertain glance at her and picked up the knife and the fork, while his body was already rebelling, foreseeing all the movements to be made. Lazily, he cut off a piece and sent it to his mouth. "Mm, surprisingly, I might make it, at least through the half of it," he flashed her a quick smile and gestured towards the opposite couch. He had some talking to do.

When some of the steak disappeared, and he had washed it down with a few gulps of water, Kai leaned back against the cushions for a pause and looked at Bonnie. "Magic for us is the same as life force," he started. "We have more of it than average humans, and thus we get sick less, live longer and age slower. Tomorrow, the magic I've given you today will be all out or close to depletion. You will need another round. And no, I didn't mean to perform that trick a dozen times a day – it's too tough even for me. I hope once would be enough. But it'll take almost all of it. I mean, I'll be really close to dead when – and if – we teleport from here. And you won't have enough to heal me there – not before you retrieve your bear and reclaim your own power. This was why I said it'd be poor odds for me. But since it's the only way, I'm willing to take my chances and lose if I have to – all better than being stuck here. Does that answer your questions?" He gave her an inquiring look and sent another bite of meat in his mouth, chewing thoughtfully.

"Most of them," Bonnie responded and fell quiet, still displeased he was looking at playing the sacrificial lamb. They had no idea what would happen tomorrow and neither of them was looking forward to a repeat of today, but what if she did the spell, something went wrong, and she couldn't heal him again? Bonnie shuddered to think.

"What if we could communicate with them? With Damon?" she asked aloud, clearly thinking it over, trying to make sense of the point she was trying to make. "You were able to send yourself here. I have the device now, maybe I could do a similar thing. I could let him know we're trying to escape and to ready my bear or his wrist so you at least stand a better chance of survival." As she could only assume Damon was still keeping it safe for her.

Damon's name pricked Kai with exasperation, and for a moment, he thought he tasted its bitterness in the last pieces of the steak he was doing his best to finish. He understood perfectly why every time she was grasping at straws Damon's name surfaced right away – after spending so much time here, Damon was the only beacon of home she had the closest to touch in her mind. But understanding didn't mean Kai had to like it. And all the things he could have told her about her precious Damon – maybe, just for the heck of it, to see if she changed her mind when she saw a bigger picture.

None of it was ready to come out of him yet, though, and he put the empty plate on the table, took the bottle with water and rinsed the meat down.

Bonnie smiled to herself, delighted to see that he finished his steak and could now give himself a chance to make a speedy recovery. If he let it.

Then Kai lowered back on the cushions and gave her a patient, reasonable look. "You mean you'd rather waste the magic to – in better case – play a ghost for Damon – if you get to him, that is – where he won't be able to see or hear you, instead of trying to actually get out in full flesh. Is that right? I know I'm not dying for that to happen."

"That's not what I meant at all," Bonnie said defensively, feeling a semblance of rebellious guilt, irascibility and longing clutch at her heart. Was that what she was trying to do? Was she that desperate? Was she that eager to simply see Damon again? Quite possibly. The recording no longer served the same excitement and the idea alone only saddened her.

When Bonnie had died before becoming the anchor, she never enjoyed being able to actively see her friends move on with their lives without her or their lack of regard for her. She had to remind herself that she was dead, that this was good and what she wanted for them. She didn't long for those forced instances—and had never spoken about them with anyone—but she could appreciate it now and knew that if she was to spend another few months here – that that particular fiat wouldn't be so bad.

"I only wanted to make sure you wouldn't end up a cabbage on the other side," she began in what she hoped was a reasonable tone, thinking better of trying to come up with a swaying argument. Kai made his choice. "So, now what… I have you power, it's on a timer and we've many hours before the next eclipse comes into play. We sleep? And hope this day passes quickly?" She uncurled her legs from beneath her as she pushed off the chair. "We should get you upstairs. You'll be more comfortable." She, too, would be more relaxed in what she deemed her own environment. As long as she'd been living in the Salvatore Boardinghouse, it didn't feel like hers, even though she knew every nook and cranny now. "And make an effort to reacquaint ourselves with season one of Xena or Die Hard to take our minds off things. It'll help pass the time."

Kai found the word sleep very alluring and that alone filled his eyelids with more weight. But he couldn't imagine dragging himself off the couch, let alone upstairs. He could no longer resist the pull and let his eyes close. The relief he experienced was like landing on a featherbed in heaven. Kai already felt the world around him swim and sway, like a ship on gentle ocean waves. "You go and… have fun…" he uttered in a thick, sleepy voice. "I… just leave me here… for now."

Concern played across Bonnie's features as his eyelids drooped, the idea of movement clearly exhausting to him and his recovering body. She stared at him a minute, deciding against going upstairs, and headed for the blankets cupboard in the laundry room. She yanked two blankets free from one of the collective piles and walked back into the room where he was peacefully snoozing. She set one blanket down on the three-seat couch to his left and used the other to cover him. She didn't want him getting cold. Not that the weather changed within their magical lockbox much or that they could up and catch the flu, but with everything that happened she wasn't willing to leave anything to chance. She wanted this to work.

Bonnie went to rifle through the books she'd read a dozen times stacked upon the floor out of the way near her favorite spot in front of the fireplace. She claimed one and spread out on the couch, laying in much the same position Kai was, wanting to be within earshot in case he needed her.

It wasn't long before she, too, dozed off.


	9. Chapter 9

Kai woke up in a jerk and spent a few unpleasant, disoriented seconds trying to recollect where, when and why he was. He felt sick and badly needed to have a trip to the bathroom. It was dark in the parlor, the fire in the hearth was reduced to a few feeble yellow tongues slithering over red gleaming embers. As he tried to sit up, Kai discovered a plaid draped over him. A small, tentative smile of appreciation snuck onto his lips and unwittingly widened as he noticed Bonnie dozing on the opposite couch, under a twin plaid. There was an open book lying cover-up on her middle. The nature-call urge spurred him to finally get up. He swayed as he did, his knees trembling with weakness and threatening to unbuckle. He bent, holding on to the couch's arm, feeling more nauseous now, until his head stopped swimming so badly and allowed him to slowly straighten up. He stood like that for a bit, to make sure he wouldn't crumble, then made a few unsteady steps, getting better at it with each. God, he couldn't remember feeling that weak ever since having chickenpox at ten.

He gingerly took the book off Bonnie's stomach, freezing as she stirred in her sleep, and put it on the table, same way open and cover-up as it rested on her, then was on his way to the bathroom. Once he was done with the business, Kai threw a glimpse in the mirror and barely recognized his pale face. He suddenly got scared for their mission freedom at the midday. How could he possibly give her enough if he was barely alive? It was so stupid to let her have her way. And tomorrow, when she realized it herself, it would be too late to rearrange it, and they would be stuck in this hole for another d—

"Fuck," he gritted, bringing down a fist on the edge of the basin. He didn't put much force into it, and yet it took more than his body could afford to flush down the drain yet. On the bright side, the grim thoughts subsided, and he could attend to more urgent matters, like changing out of the Freddy Krueger's victim's outfit. The crust of dried blood on his tee-shirt was scratching his skin. It was still quiet in the parlor, and he dragged himself upstairs where he showered and changed. Upon zipping a new pair of jeans on, Kai was so exhausted the bed seemed like a mirage in a desert, too close and yet too far away. The thirst, however, had his mouth parched and resembling a desert on its own, so he went back towards the parlor, tempted to sit down on the stairs after overcoming every five of them.

That must be how our grandma used to feel, he mused, stepping off the staircase and heading for the kitchen. He took a glass from the shelf, turned on the tap and stood filling it when new details of how crappy he felt came into the light of his awareness. His neck hurt – but that could be the discomfort of the sleep; his ribs and back and legs hurt the way they do when in fever – but he felt no fever present, and having just the symptoms without the cause was odd. The light nausea Kai wrote off to the hunger and thirst. He turned off the water and gulped down two thirds of the glass eagerly, gasped for breath and waited. It did its part – the thirst was gone – and it indeed took some edge off, but the rest remained. He started bringing the glass back to his lips when suddenly his arm felt limp, as if all the muscles in it turned to jelly. Two invisible hands pressed on his head from each side, squeezing, his ears rang so loudly he might have groaned – he didn't hear. There was a faint sound of breaking glass, and as the room swayed around him, he remembered he wasn't holding the glass anymore. I dropped it, he thought with a distracted wonder, and then his mind let go.

Bonnie woke up sometime in the middle of the night, her mind foggy as she pushed off the couch she'd fallen asleep on and headed upstairs to shower. Ancient wooden floorboards creaked with her every step, ominously filling the silent night, a chilling breeze sending a rush of apprehension racing up her spine. She stopped walking and glanced over her shoulder, briefly inspecting the four in lined doors in anticipation of company. She listened for sound, waiting for someone to step forth and then spared another look in the opposite direction, to the end of the hall, momentarily riveted by the lone lace curtain dancing in the moonlight that spilled in through the open window. Bonnie shook off the increasing terror, chiding herself for stupidity, and walked into her bedroom, kicking the door closed to pacify her cumulative uneasiness.

She took her time in the shower, washing away the day's stresses, and then changed into a fresh set of candy stripped pajama bottoms and 'I love ken' white tee-shirt.

"Knock-knock, Bonnie! I'm home!"

She smiled to herself, securing a towel on her wet hair, and hurried out into the hall. It was still dark. She stopped, once again overcome with fear. "I wasn't expecting you back," she remarked, unable to keep the tremble from her voice.

No answer.

"Dad?!" Bonnie yelled, praying he'd answer, her feet moving at their own accord as she headed for the rift of panels that descended into the living room. God, it was so dark. She didn't like it down there. "Dad," she called out a little more tentatively.

"Down here, baby. In the kitchen! I have something I want to show you!"

She took a hold of the banister for support and bare-footedly made her way down, her eyes anxiously scanning every shadowy corner of the acquainted living room. "I hope it isn't any more food," she said, trying to remain cheery and buoyant. "I'm stuffed." She raced to the kitchen and theatrically swung her way in with the use of the archway, a wide smile on her lips as she did. She frowned when she saw the lack of brown carrier bags on the counter, no takeaway boxes, and more importantly – no Daddy Bennett. "I am a little too old for hide-and-seek, Dad," she remarked with a candid laugh, suddenly aware of the open backdoor.

Bonnie was drawn to it, incapable of turning away as she stepped through and into a familiar crowd, their eyes trained ahead, fixed upon the stage where her father gave a heartwarming speech she'd heard a thousand times over in her head. It was the one and only time she'd ever truly felt loved by him and that maybe—in spite of her insecurities and feelings of abandonment—he actually missed her. She smiled, chuckling softly as she always did in appreciation of his mention of her and felt her blood turn cold as Stefan stepped on stage. For a moment, Bonnie was muddled, lost in what was happening, and started with a horrid realization only as she saw the blade slide against her father's throat. Blood gushing forth to shower the stage and to stain his dress shirt, a shrill knee-weakening scream spilled from her lips.

Bonnie ran toward his fallen body, unable to speak, babbling incoherently as she attempted to stave the bleeding and tried to reestablish life in his eyes. "Nononononono," she murmured over and over, her bloodied hands trembling.

"Unfortunate about the old man," Silas deliberated without sympathy, wiping the blade clean upon her father's pants leg. "But being Mayor often comes with a deadly price."

An inhuman snarl sounded from her lips as Bonnie lunged at the witch, knocking him onto his back, the knife skittering from his grip, her hands wrapped around his throat. She didn't know where she got the strength to repeatedly bash his head against the floor, a hand raised to the air just long enough to have the knife appear in her ready palm and to drive it into his skull. All at once the fighting stopped. She breathed hard, the hate-filled fog clearing, leaving her harrowed and numb as she pushed off the Silas's motionless corpse. She barely spared him or her father a thought, the knife slipping from her aching hand as she staggered toward the house.

She was missing something, something important.

"Naughty girl," a voice said sounding a touch angry and amused, something she recognized to be the ascendant in his hand. "You weren't looking to leave without me, were you?"

Bonnie reacted without hesitation, a hand extended before her like a lethal battle axe, various hospital carts attacking Kai from every angle to buy her time to escape. And then she was running, charging along an unending road, the world shifting in and around her like a dark cocoon that would swallow her whole if she stopped.

Bonnie shot awake, nearly toppling from the couch, disorientated and jumbled, startled to find herself in the Salvatore boarding house. She blinked like a rabid animal, darting a look around, breathing a sigh of genuine relief when she realized she was alone, having half-expected Silas or Kai to jump out at her. It was only as she lay back down and started to calm down that she remembered she wasn't alone and that one of her inner terrors was, in fact, still loitering around. That he'd come back for her, but this time—not in the awful manner her nightmare depicted. Kai was harmless for now—good even. She lifted her head once more, peering across at the couch where she expected him to be still asleep and froze when she saw it empty.

Where the hell was he?

Bonnie sat up, disentangling her legs from the blanket, and flittered a look at the book set on the table beside her. He did that or had she? She couldn't remember and for now she didn't care. "Kai?!" she called, hating herself for the tremor that found its way into her voice, an onset of the nightmare she was still shaking off. She checked the nearest bathroom first, thinking maybe he needed to relieve himself—he was human, after all—and then checked the kitchen, rushing inside when she saw him unconscious on the floor. She knelt beside him, wincing as she did, having seen the glass too late. She ignored the pain radiating through her foot, bringing a hand to his pale face, slapping at his cheek in attempt to wake him up. When he didn't stir, Bonnie checked his pulse and simultaneously pressed an ear to his chest to listen for a heartbeat.

What if he'd killed himself again? What if he'd gotten fed up?

She forced herself to her feet, mindful of the shattered glass around them this time, picking another glass off the drying rack to fill it. She knelt beside him a second time, dipping her fingers into the water, sprinkling it upon his pale face in attempt to rouse him.

A small gust of breeze caressed Kai's face and sent a wave of gooseflesh across his spine and arms. There was definitely something new about how Jo looked at him – even in the twilight of the eclipse, he could see it in her eyes. An uncharacteristic bravery that seemed to have left her completely after yesterday's events. And the rest of the coven surrounding them like silent ghosts observing an act of doom playing out – he could sense the same from them. It tasted like…

A trap.

Their father's voice broke the dead silence, unleashing the worst of headaches Kai had never known was possible at all. With a strangled scream, he fell on his knees and never felt the pang of collision in them, consumed by the agony inside his skull he was clutching. The forest around became a mad swirl of treetops over him, and Kai became vaguely aware of how cold the ground beneath his back was. Jo's face was the last glimpse he ever got before the blinding explosion of light spirited them all away from him, and it was the little smile she was wearing that had carved itself into the core of his memory and haunted him into unconsciousness and back.

His head still hurt a bit just beneath his forehead and around the temples, adding to the subtle nausea. He heard himself groan weakly as he stirred and opened his eyes half-mast. Her face was blurred out.

"Jo…" he managed in a hoarse whisper and coughed. His throat was completely dry, he felt dizzy. And then he remembered. It wasn't Jo. It was Bonnie, and they were in their little hell. Still. Kai groaned again, this time in weak frustration. "There's really something wrong with me, Bon."

Bonnie stared down at him, her heart in a trepidation. What was going on? Who was Jo? Was it the lack of blood? What if the meat was off? Was that even possible? Her mind raced with possibilities. What was she to do now?

It was damn hard to keep his eyes open, so Kai let them close again as he tried to get his thoughts together. They were slow and heavy, like spilled molasses. His whole head was heavy it felt as though the floor would crack under its weight.

"It's okay, I'm going to take care of you," she crooned in the sweetest tone she could muster, resigning herself to her inescapable fate and the obvious deed that needed doing. If Kai was truly dying, if he'd reached a point of no return and she'd botched up the healing process in some way, then she couldn't let him suffer the agony of waiting for the unavoidable. It seemed too cruel.

Kai had never heard a tone that sweet coming from her, not to Damon, and of course not to him. He heard her feet trot away – probably back to the parlor – and he wondered what she was going to do. Hopefully, not offer him another steak – he didn't feel like eating anything at all. He needed to drink. He craved for water but had no strength to pick himself up from the floor just yet.

Bonnie removed the knife from beneath the couch cushion she'd shoved it earlier to hide from him. There was little to no hesitation in her decision now, a slight tremor the only indication of nerves.

Bonnie's returning footfalls were as loud as a giant's would be. They thudded in Kai's brain, making it shake like jelly. With his eyes still closed, Kai felt her kneel beside him and hover. She smelled nice, like some exotic flower. Some fancy shower gel. Her face was out of focus when he glanced at her, but he still saw worry and distress. A part of him felt guilty for adding to her plate of suffering that had already been too full, but there was another part that was faintly pleased that she was worried. Even if it was a trick of his imagination.

"Close your eyes, Kai," she said, seeing his eyelids droop and flutter open with disorientation as he tried to focus on her.

When she killed Kai for the first time, it wasn't out of pleasure or some sense of spitefulness, but a mere means of doing what she thought was right. He was a self-proclaimed psycho that reveled in massacring his family and raved about his desire to finish the job. In what world would she ever think to release someone like that into the world again? She couldn't claim to be one hundred percent sure of who this person was—this groaning figure beneath her—but a part of her could see the change he talked about last night. Or maybe she just wanted to see it? Maybe she was that desperate for another person in this desolate prisoner that she was blinded and willing to accept anyone? Either way, the decision wasn't easy this time.

Her fingers stroke through his hair soothingly, and instead of actually soothing, it alarmed him. As if there was the thinnest thread of sense of danger within him and she accidentally brushed against it. The thread vibrated, sending a high-pitched tone through his nerves.

Bonnie's eyes locked on his own, mesmerized by the sheer look of fear on his face. As sick as he was, he wasn't able to mask it as he usually did.

Kai stared at her, searching her face. She had almost the same look as she did hours earlier in the parlor when he suggested to reenact his close-to-death performance. Kai cleared his throat and coughed. "Wh—… What are you… doing?" Words felt heavy, too.

And then, an invisible vice closed on Kai's head again, squishing viciously. He clutched at his temples as if to hold the brain in, his back arched as he let out a strangled cry. For a second, he was cold, as though someone threw him in a pile of snow, and next moment a flash of heat swept through his body setting the nerves and sinews ablaze.

Bonnie sat back to give him breathing room, knife in hand, feeling at a complete and total loss of what to do, tears of frustration springing to her eyes.

 _Do I go for it? Do I end it? Do I make that final sweep and hope for the best?_

Bonnie's eyes, drawn by an unanticipated movement in her peripheral vision, unintentionally found their way around the kitchen, dazed and alarmed by the lively flash and change of scenery. "What the fuck," she whispered, her heart jumping into her throat, immediately making a grab for his thigh to anchor them together in case they disappeared or fell through a crack. There was something really, really wrong. Was his being here ripping the prison world's fabric apart?

Kai emitted another cry – weaker than the first one – thinking he was going to pass out again, and then it let go, as suddenly as it gripped him. His hands fell away from his head, and he lay there panting, unable to move. His heart thrashing against his ribs and his pulse raping at his temples. His ears were ringing so much it sounded like someone was shrieking non-stop right into each of them, trying to make his head explode. The next groan he let out he didn't even register. "God… what the… hell is it…"

"I don't know," she answered, her free hand remaining firm in its place upon his thigh, somewhat afraid of removing it. What if the next time that happened he disappeared without her?

Kai could hardly make out her words through the blood flushing and his pulse thudding in his ears as though someone was smashing a hammer against his ribcage from the inside in hopes of breaking out. He thought he felt her hand on his leg, gripping, but he wasn't sure – too many aches traveled through his body to register such thing.

"It's like we're shifting between realities or… this place is breaking apart. I can't tell." She glanced down at him, trying to measure whether or not he looked better or if now that he'd had an attack of sorts he was capable of functioning again.

Kai peered up at her, having a hard time mulling over what she was saying. _What realities…_

"Whatever it is… I don't suppose we have much time to get out of here. How are you feeling?" She knew that question to be the worst but was in desperate need of an answer. "Are you okay? Whatever is going on seems to be taking it a whole lot out on you."

Kai emitted a chuckle and coughed. "I'm not okay, Bonnie. I… don't know what it is. I feel… wrung out." Remembering her earlier remark, he frowned and tried to keep his eyes from closing as he set them on her. "What was it… about realities?"

"I… I couldn't tell—" Firstly, the flashes were far too quick and what Bonnie managed to make out seemed like a predominant figment of her imagination. "But you either teleported or shifted us from this kitchen to another, like… similar place, I guess, but years apart—" she explained, making no sense whatsoever—at least to herself—not even sure it was a kitchen to begin with or a basement. Maybe it was a parlor? It looked far too bleak and compact, the partial reminisce of candlelight coming to her for a second, doing nothing to clarify things for her or make her give him a rational answer. "We're going to have to figure this out. But you're of no use to yourself or me in this state and certainly not to the reality of this place." Bonnie didn't think they had much time to play around with a choice and the chance healing anymore, and who knew what would happen if he had another seizure. He seemed to be on the verge of passing out and was straining to keep his eyes open.

Kai stared at her, searching her face as it came in and out of focus with the frantic beats of his heart, and sensing the realization dawning in the back of his foggy mind. He watched her lean over her and put a knife over his chest, the tip almost touching it. The blade still had his blood on it; her hand was trembling. He felt the physical impulse twitch somewhere deep within him to recoil from it, the most natural impulse of the body to protect itself, however screwed it was to begin with. But he wasn't sure he would even if he had stamina for it. He looked back to Bonnie and the distress he read on her face was both endearing and unsettling.

"I'll try to make it as quick as possible. Just… just close your eyes," Bonnie said, needing him to do it not only for himself, but for her, too. She knew what it was like seeing someone kill you, to have that vision and the look upon the killer's face forever correlated in your head.

Her voice was trembling same as her hand, Kai noted. She was actually about to cry, and it somehow mesmerized him. What she was asking came belated to his mind, and he realized it was harder to comply than he would think. The normal instinct of people to hide from danger and pull the covers over their heads not to see the closet monster was alien to him. Kai always had to see.

He swallowed with effort, something clicking in his dry throat, and glanced at her hand again. It shook more now, and he had an understanding her resolve might be starting to seep away.

Bonnie scrutinized Kai, patiently anticipating his nod of approval, clandestinely wishing he'd rebuke the idea and give her an inkling of faith in his recovery.

A phantom throe pierced Kai's chest under the blade as if to prepare for the pain to come. "Okay," he breathed, and looked at her for the last time, trying a weak, encouraging smile. Then he made himself obey.

Bonnie tightened my sweaty grip on the handle of the knife, applying a bit of pressure, her eyes remaining focused on the nominated spot on his chest as if it were painted with a bull's eye. She inhaled, wondering how hard she was going to have to push to force it through the bone and if it would be as straightforward as she imagined. _Is murder ever?_ The funny—or morbid, depending on how you looked at it—thing was she spent nights imagining what she would do to him once she was out of this stinking prison world—and hoping she wouldn't have to see him again—visiting many brutal deaths upon him in her dreams. Unmentionable things that were far less merciful than her former axe toss. And yet, even as she recalled to memory his cold, knowing smirk as that knife hovered in front of her face before he drove it into her middle, Bonnie still couldn't find the strength to kill him, even if—and hopefully—it was only temporarily.

It was the longest uneasy moment in Kai's life, it seemed. With only his uneven, frantic pulse to count passing time, he lost himself in it soon enough. He couldn't remember feeling that vulnerable in a very long time. The tip of the blade pricked his chest, making him internally strain – and then nothing happened, still. It was like some kind of a torture, and he had to force his eyes to remain shut. His breath was catching in his throat, and his heart was all but trying to bust through his chest to that knife. For a second, he felt the urge to yell at her to just do it. Through that sharp tip, he felt her hand shake more intensely.

She tried once more, feeling the last of her strength seep out of her arms, sending an array of frightful tingles through her – none of which was pleasant. "I can't do it," she stated as if she'd failed at a standard task she should be able to do with her hands tied behind her back. "I won't." She tossed the knife aside, it clanged against the floor.

Kai started a little and snapped his eyes open to peer at her as her fingers rubbed at the spot she was aiming at earlier as if to soothe. She straightened up over him, still kneeled, and sat back with a glass of water. She pulled his head on her lap and helped him drink.

The water almost went the wrong way – his throat was so dry he almost chocked on it, drawing hungry gulps. Kai thanked her in a still a bit hoarse voice and studied her lost expression, unable to bite back a chuckle. "Damn, I've never thought you're so good at torture."

"Me neither," Bonnie interjected, sounding rather apologetic about dragging it out like that, all too aware now that the suspense took its toll on him, too.

A small laugh escaped him, and elicited a bout of painful coughs. "I do feel too crappy to explain it with… blood loss alone," Kai shared. "So maybe you're right and—"

It came as abruptly as the first two times, wracking through his brain and squishing it. He let out a strangled grunt, his body going rigid. He tasted blood in his mouth, and then the reality just started to drift away, taking pain and senses with it.

"No," Bonnie murmured, registering the transient rush of pain that etched into his features, the glass set aside without bothering to be gentle about it. He grunted, his body stiffening, forcing her to crawl out from beneath him and to take an instinctive hold of his head. She rolled him over onto his side, fearful of what to expect and scared he'd lapse into a fit and choke on his own tongue. Who knew how bad this would get? Or the predictability of whatever was wracking through him? All she knew was the fleeting signs. Her heart leapt into her throat as he stilled, his body going limb. Bonnie rolled him over onto his back again, a small trickle of blood gathered in the corner of his mouth. Had he bitten his tongue? She refrained from opening his mouth to check and instead pressed two fingers to his pulse. She closed her eyes, patiently waiting, smiling when she felt it—a slow thrumming against her fingertips. Kai was still alive, barely holding on but alive. She needed to get him to the hospital.

She raised her head, moving to a quick standing to go in search of a sheet with which to drag him to the garage, and felt the air drain from her lungs. "Oh God," she breathed out with noticeable fear, scarcely recognizing anything but the distinguished pots stacked around her for easy use.

 _Where the hell are we?_

"Kai," Bonnie began, crouching to grab a hold of his shoulders hopeful he'd wake up and snap them back to their former home-base. "Kai, wake up!"


	10. Chapter 10

Liv was advancing towards him, a poker in her hand, blood dripping slowly from its pointy end, her eyes blazing with hatred. "It's not quite as easy this time, is it, Kai?" she said, a small sinister smile touching her mouth.

Kai glanced at the floor around him and saw no fork. It was weird – he remembered there had to be a fork somewhere… Cruel twinges gripped him with every breath he took, more blood seeping through his fingers pressing to the wound in his stomach she'd inflicted. He could feel blood spurting out from the hole in his back, too. He was already dizzy. Jeremy had to be here, as well, but Kai couldn't seem to locate him, either. It was just Kai and Liv, stuck in their private thriller movie.

Kai chuckled unwittingly, blood staining his lips, and sat back on his haunches, waiting for her to deliver the final blow. "I see you learned some things, sis. Good for you."

Her lips pulled back in a snarl. "It's gonna be good in a second." She had the poker cocked back like a baseball player before the strike.

He watched her and distantly remembered Bonnie.

 _She was in the kitchen with me… or was she?_

Kai couldn't tell anymore, like there were conflicting realities in his head and he couldn't pick the right one. He wanted to go to the kitchen to see if Bonnie was there, but he knew he wouldn't get up. There was too much pain and too little strength left. And, maybe, no time.

Liv let out a cry and swung the poker.

He jerked back instinctively and … a jolt of pain went through his shoulder-blades as they hit the hard surface beneath him. There was a voice. It was calling his name, he realized dumbly. A coughing fit was coming mixed with nausea, and he rolled onto his side, propping himself off the floor on trembling arms, feeling like he was coughing up a lung or something no less significant. A few large dark drops of blood glistened on the wooden floor beneath him. Kai felt a hot palm on his back, thought of Bonnie, and looked up before him.

There was a figure in the doorway, a woman in a dress that had to be severely outdated. She was gaping at them.

Bonnie gasped with relief when he delicately jerked awake within her grip, grimacing as he coughed and struggled onto his side. She helped him the rest of the way over, rubbing at his back in clumsy attempt to soothe him and discharge whatever was stuck to his lungs. She glanced up as he did, the hairs on the back of her neck standing to cautionary attention, her eyes transfixed upon the woman staring at them in the doorway.

Bonnie opened her mouth to ask the stranger who she was and where the hell they were when another cough ripped through Kai and stole her attention. She registered the blood with some alarm, shocked by the substantial amount upon the floor, feeling slightly lightheaded when she looked up again, desiring—all of a sudden—to ask for the woman's help.

She was gone and they were back in their 1994 kitchen.

Bonnie's hand – Kai was hoping to God it was her and not Liv or anyone – flexed on his shoulder, fingers digging in. Another bout of sickness rolled up to his throat. He coughed up more blood and collapsed, panting. Bonnie's blurry face came into view.

"Did you… what the… hell…" he tried and gave up, attempting to control his breath.

"I saw her," she confirmed, shaking off her increasing stupor and wonder. Whatever they'd tapped into hadn't anything to do with the present, unless it was some stage show. She leaned down, wasting no more time, and slid her arms beneath his upper body, hauling him away from the glass he'd broken, through his blood and toward the living room to where she knew their blankets were. She wasn't even going to ask him to walk as she didn't want him unnecessarily exerting himself.

The task was taking a serious strain on her, though Kai was helping with his legs, and yet her strength surprised him. It had to be stress pulling out her hidden resources, and if so – she was going to collapse soon. Neither of them needed her, too, to be out of commission.

"Try not to pass out or… send us back to wherever the hell that is," she said, smiling once she managed to get him onto a blanket. "Not until I at least get you to the hospital."

"Wait… what?" He couldn't help a nervous, half amused laugh when she finally let go and collapsed beside him leaning against the couch, they both panting. "How's that gonna help anything? What are you gonna do there, strap me to a bed? Or knock me out with painkillers – assuming you identify them? None of it is productive. And…" He stopped, scowling as another nauseating fit was looming near, and gave her an apprehensive look. "If it's me glitching us, I… must be because of how bad my condition is… whatever it is. I don't know what it is, but it's like suddenly there's Mighty Hulk trying to squish my head, and I can't control it. And my bones ache like I've fever. And I feel sick."

They were running out of time. Bonnie didn't need a diagnosis to know that, and from the look in his alarmed eyes, neither did Kai.

He bent slightly as a cough ripped out, and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand – there was more blood. He observed it with a sense of surreal bewilderment. "This can't be good."

It was like he had magical TB or something. "It's not," she responded breathlessly, straining to calm her racing heart and the increasing anxiety that felt the need to make itself known at this moment. Also, her bleeding foot wasn't enjoying the extra pressure and started to get niggly. "If I can get you to the hospital, at least… as you said, there are painkillers and more importantly, blood."

Kai blanked for a moment. Where did he even start to explain how useless it all was? Another bout of nausea and two deep coughs with more blood seeping out of his mouth gave no time to dwell on it. He took in a deep breath, then pulled the plaid from under him and put it on the couch he was leaning back against. That simple task had him breathless for a second. He looked at her – afraid and trembling as she was – and felt a pang of guilt for causing it, a bite of pity that she couldn't catch a break and that he turned out to be a crappy savior. None of it he could fix right away.

"I need one major painkiller, Bonnie – the one that can turn it off and reset it. Fetch the knife."

Her heartbeat picked up another degree before he even finished his sentence. Bonnie knew what was to come, she could read it in his eyes as clear as day.

"I told you I can't do that," she said, feeling the anticipation of such an action in every bone. She could take down hybrids, snap a vampire's limbs and calcify the big bad, but this—this was beyond her reach. It was different when she knew Kai wouldn't hesitate to kill her or anyone else. But he was here solely for her this time, to _save her_ … or so he'd said. She hadn't found any other reason evidence that contradicted that, even if in this moment, she prayed that it would. Hating Kai was easier than sympathizing with him. He was right, though, they were drawing this out, risking their lives when this could be mended with one fowl swoop.

 _Hopefully_.

Bonnie rose off her haunches wobblingly, using the couch behind her for support and sluggishly made her way to the kitchen. She returned two minutes later with the knife, fingers circled around the familiarity of the hilt, testing the weight, trying to acquaint herself with its brutal intention.

The dull ache in his bones turned into a nagging Kai could no longer ignore. He slipped down on his back from the sitting position, stretched along the length of the couch to his left, and felt slightly better. Easier to breathe.

"I haven't had as much practice as you at this," Bonnie teased, sounding by no means malicious in her delivering, merely needing him to remind her of what he was. "I hope you'll forgive me for being sloppy."

She swallowed thickly as she lowered herself onto her knees, reclaiming her former position, the tip of the knife brought against his chest—or more specifically, his heart—once more. She stared down at him with noticeable consideration, patiently awaiting his reaction and murderous greenlight.

A faint smile tugging at his lips at how both impossibly vulnerable and yet strong she seemed at that moment, Kai raised a hand, taking hers gently to direct the blade to the easy access through the infrasternal notch, inclining it slightly to stab a bit upwards under the ribs, and let go. It wasn't hard as it felt earlier when she demanded he closed his eyes and waited for the hit – and with the experience he had in suicide, most of the anxiety wore off. But still, he was grateful he didn't have to do it himself this time. And he liked seeing her face. He liked how much she didn't want to do it.

Her mouth went dry as he unexpectedly closed his fist over hers, expertly guiding the blade to where it needed to be.

"If you don't come back for me," she said, the words bubbling from her lips before she could even think to fathom their importance, inherently worried about his earlier death and the time he'd taken to sputter into existence again, "I'm going to be pissed." Before he could conjure up a reply or have another magic seizure, she put her weight behind the blade, afraid that if she were to let him talk to her anymore, she'd lose her nerve.

Kai had a second to emit an amused hem. Then she drove the blade in, setting off a bomb in his chest. He gasped, and thought he felt the cold of the blade slide into his thrashing heart. It was as if someone popped a bubble they were in, and all the light poofed out. There was just the pain, rippling through his chest with every dying beat. And then, it was gone.

He gasped in visible pain as Bonnie followed through, his hand falling away. Unrestrained tears gathered in the corners of her eyes as she watched the life drain from his face. An act she knew straightaway she never wanted to repeat again.

 _Not if I can help it._

They were going to have to come up with another plan, a different—and feasible—means of seeding his magic to her. There had to be something other than the extremities of torture, or in this case, assisted suicide. She hovered over Kai for a few seconds longer than necessary to make sure he was well and truly dead, removing the hand from the blade, expelling a trembling sigh as she sat back. All that pushing and pulling really took it out of her, making it damned near impossible to even contemplate removing the knife.

I did though, yanking it out with unexpected force, wincing as something squelched unpleasantly and more blood oozed from the wound.

No one in their _right_ mind did this for fun – no one.

She let go of the knife, depositing it next to his lifeless body for now, and rose off her knees, sliding onto the couch with some difficulty, taking a few minutes to catch her breath.

Half an hour later, Bonnie had cut off his bloodied shirt, rolled him onto the blanket, simultaneously checking his wound—which had stopped bleeding ages ago—and pulled him in front of the fireplace, a pillow tucked beneath his head for when he woke up. She used his ruined shirt to clean off the blood off the hardwood floors, smiling slightly, knowing that if Damon had been present he'd be losing his shit right about now.

She found herself selfishly wishing he was.

She straightened up and headed for the kitchen, eyeing the trail of blood she'd trekked across the floor, also what Kai had coughed up, and went in search of a bucket. She tackled the parlor first, and then proceeded to the kitchen, spending well over half an hour scrubbing the floors, glad for the distraction and relishing in the ache that accompanied each exerting stroke.

By the second hour she headed outside to collect the cutlery, and by the third she'd taken another shower, pulled on her hiking boots and fresh clothes, forcing herself to patiently wait for him to wake, afraid—at the rate that he was going—that they'd miss the eclipse. /

The cold was what rose Kai, it seemed. It was settled so deep in his bones they might as well have been sticks of ice. His body involuntarily shuddered; he snapped his eyes open and immediately squeezed them shut – the blaze of fire from the hearth blinded him. Kai realized he was missing his shirt – at least he had the plaid that covered him and did nothing for warmth. He gathered its flaps and wrapped them around himself, his teeth clattering.

"God, I hate this shit," he gritted out, and felt insignificantly better having pushed it out of his system. He thought of a hot bath and almost groaned in phantom pleasure. He had to make it happen if he intended to continue being alive.

The crack between the heavy curtains oozed feeble light of the starting dawn. He wondered how long he had been out this time. He picked himself up with efforts and a few grunts of an old man. Kai recalled he was older than he looked, and missed the days when he felt the way he looked. At least his legs didn't give way, which gave him hope to see himself to that heavenly bath upstairs.

Halfway to the stairs, Bonnie happened upon him, her eyes momentarily wide as those of a girl who's been alone at home and suddenly spied a burglar in the living room. Kai tried a smile, still cold and shaking. "Hey… Like before, I gotta bring myself back with a lot of hot water. Very hot water."

"Damon's bathroom is best for that. He has all these fancy nozzles and—" She paused, finding it ridiculous that she even felt the need to share that unnecessary piece of information. "And soaps. I'll run ahead and get things started," she concluded, wiping her wet hands on her jeans, jogging toward the stairwell.

Kai watched her trot towards the stairs, momentarily forgotten about his discomforts in favor of the slight bafflement. Was she going to watch him like a hawk every moment now so he wouldn't secretly collapse in one corner or the other? That idea was both unsettling and funny.

She stopped at the bottom, one hand upon the railing as she turned back to regard him again. "You'll be okay with the stairs?" She didn't really want to injure his pride any further, but neither to see him with a broken neck. Kai looked in fit form and was obviously in much better shape than before, but you never knew and Bonnie wasn't all that eager to play the ghost-whisperer again anytime soon.

What, you want to carry me up? he wanted to ask, but instead he waved a hand at her with a reassuring nod. "I'm okay, and so I will be. There's no need to worry."

Bonnie headed straight for the bath as she stepped into Damon's room, simultaneously turning on both the hot and cold tap. Adding one of the dissolving muscle relaxant soap things that Damon had been kind enough to introduce her to awhile back. She bent over the bath, elbows resting on the rim, one arm dangling into the water to test the temperature and mix it up.

Kai leaned in the doorway, eyeing her with an ironic smirk. "I'll be fine, really. Just give me twenty minutes and I'll feel human again. I hope."

Bonnie withdrew her hand with a chuckle, grasping only now, as she looked at his face, how ridiculous she was being by trying to mollycoddle him. He didn't need looking after.

"No problem," she said, stepping back from the bath, making quick work of drying my hands on the nearby towel. "I'll throw together some tea and sandwiches for our expedition part two. Might be best if we make a slow start there as soon as you're ready?"

Kai nodded, and she hurried past him and out of the room as though her heels were catching fire. It made him chuckle when he was sure she was out of her earshot.

She wanted to make sure there was magic, that the ascendant was okay, that he was okay, and that they'd get there without a hitch. After what happened earlier, after the split in their flimsy reality, Bonnie wasn't going to leave anything to chance to screw this up.

Kai filled the tub with hot water and when he stepped into it, it scalded him. He went rigid, lowering himself in it ungracefully, and it took a minute or so for his body to start uncoiling. He gradually relaxed and let the warmth in, closing his eyes, resting the back of his head against the tub rim.

He caught himself sliding under the water right when his next inhale was no air at all. His body jerked, hand shooting out to grab onto the tub, water sloshing out, before he even fully woke up. He coughed, blinking, and waited for his heartbeat to slow down to normal before pulling the plug out.

Kai realized he felt definitely better while he dried himself off and picked a sweatshirt from Damon's drawer. He sat on the bed and keeled down on his back, heaving a sigh, closing his eyes. Just a moment… a minute of peace… just… a little…

He slept.

Bonnie poured the set tea into a flask, wrapped their sandwiches in foil, and tucked them into a plastic bag in case it got accidentally squished. She zipped up her travel bag, glanced at the clock on the far left of the kitchen close to the radio and tried to figure out how long Kai had been in the bathtub. Thirty minutes? Fifteen?

"Relax, Bonnie. He's a grown man, he doesn't need a prospective nurse hanging over his shoulder," she chided herself, walking over to the CD player, scanning the small collection of titles she'd been listening to for over two months. Damon's taste in music was all but gone, discs she'd broken in a fitful rage one night after things got too much.

She chose to stick with the music already in the player and sung along to four or five songs to distract herself from the time, busying herself with their small few dishes and dusting.

When she was done, she heaved a sigh, switched on the kettle once more, made him tea as she'd done the night before, and headed upstairs.

She approached Damon's room, forcing a chipper smile onto her lips to mask her obvious worry and need to check on him.

"Hey… um… I thought you could use some tea." Bonnie pushed open the door with her shoulder, using her free hand to shield her eyes as she walked in in case he was already getting dressed. She kept a hold on the mug's handle, awaiting his response, and then lowered her hand when there came none. She didn't know what she was expecting, but it certainly wasn't him lying on Damon's bed.

"Kai?" she called, approaching the bed, eyeing his chest for any sign of movement, feeling a sense of relief when she saw that it did. She set the tea down on the bedside table and eased onto the bed beside him, tucking one leg beneath her butt, guiltily weighing up the idea of waking him up. She decided against it and let him sleep a few more minutes, unsure of when he'd drifted off but assuming he needed it. A glance at the yellow watch on her left arm assured her there was enough time left to do so, four more hours to be exact. They could make it to the cave in less than two. /

Two streetlamps glared in the darkness, making the black of the night thicker around the sphere of white light they incarcerated the stela in. Jo's silhouette was one cut out of a black paper against that light. The fallen leaves crunched under his sneakers like carcasses of long dead little animals as Kai approached. Her hands were in her pockets, the wind playing with her hair.

"Jo?" he called as an uncharacteristic worry clutched his gut. What was she doing there? The merge was done, and she was off the hook. What else was there to talk about?

There was a strange sound, and Kai realized it came from her. Her back was to him, and she didn't turn when he called her name again. There was another sound, just like the previous one – either a sob or—

She turned when he put a hand on her shoulder, and her eyes blazed at him with accusing hatred so scalding he staggered a step back. It didn't seem right on her face, on her in general. Kai never forgot that gleeful little smile she wore when he was being sent off to the prison world, but it was nothing like that mask of Kali in all her fury. He would expect her to throw herself at him and try to scratch his eyes out, but she stood still, only her face seething with rage.

"You finally did it," she said – more like spat out like a snake spits its venom. "You killed us."

"I—what? What the hell does it me—"

She started laughing. Out of the blue. Her face twisted into an even scarier grimace as she bellowed laughter that grew louder but didn't shake her body. She was still as a statue, and her horrid laugh was as though coming from somewhere beyond her. It made his skin crawl. Kai wanted to back away, and couldn't. His feet were rooted.

She shuddered, still laughing, and he saw that her hands weren't in her pockets – they were clutching her stomach. Another violent tremor shook her, and she made a coughing sound. Her lips glistened with dark crimson; it trickled down to her chin, and the laughter still came rolling from her like thunder.

"You will DIE," she hissed, and laughed, laughed harder, blood dripping from her lips, her chin.

He gasped, suddenly feeling his chest was too tight. He wanted to cough, but couldn't push it out. He couldn't move. His heart was thrashing, stealing the last of air from his lungs. And then, a terrible throe gripped and twisted his insides. Kai bent over, spilling a strangled cry with drops of blood.

The world tripped over, and he was suddenly on his back, chocking for air. No more streetlamps; and there was a bed beneath him. A voice called his name; he felt a hand on him. Kai kept gulping breath after breath, and the throe loosened like a persistent nightmare upon awakening.

Bonnie crawled to the top of the bed, making herself comfortable among Damon's pillows, reaching for the book he'd been busy with before he returned to the real world. She drew her knees up, resting the book against her clothed thighs and peered over at Kai for a second, just sitting next to him while he slept felt surreal still. It was too domestic, too relaxed for what she ever felt around him or imagined. She brushed off the silly musing, getting through four or five pages before the motionless figure beside her suddenly gasped.

She sat up immediately, discarding the book with ease, unmindful of where it landed, and grabbed a hold of his shoulders. She hadn't for a second thought that he was having a nightmare, more worried about what happened earlier and his rickety power.

"Kai, Kai, wake up!" she said, shaking him slightly.

"Jo," he choked with a cough to a blurry figure hovering over him, and tried to back away, but his body didn't yet support the effort.

His face twisted with recognizable alarm baffled her; he gripped at the sheets to escape her, hardly managing it.

"It's okay—you're safe," she said, taking a stronger hold of his shoulder, hoping it would provide enough incentive to wake him up further. "I'm not—I am not Joe." Was that his father? He'd called their name before, only this time it was with a semblance of vulnerability that she hadn't expected to see again. Not so soon.

No, it wasn't Jo glaring down at him with that mad bloody grin.

It was Bonnie's face distorted with worry. Her grip on his shoulders gentle, yet firm.

He blinked the haze away, swallowing hard as his body slumped on the bed, trying to catch his breath. A ghost of embarrassment stole through his heart as he looked at Bonnie, tried a smile on that didn't fully fit. "Some weird dream. I don't even recall what it was all about – twisted like most of them are. I just sat down for, like, a minute… I wasn't even tired. How long have I been out?"

"You've been out of it for about thirty-five minutes," she said, withdrawing from him. "As far as I'm aware. It could be more."

Somehow it felt longer, Kai thought, and rubbed his face.

"Who's Jo?" she asked suddenly, making him freeze for a moment with his hands on his face and his heart thumping hollowly. "You've muttered about him twice now. Is that your dad? Is that who you keep dreaming about?"

A trickle of ice crept through Kai's spine, planting anxiety in its wake. It was surprising that she heard it from him more than once now, and it made him feel vulnerable, out of control. He hated that feeling most.

He sat up and tilted his head to one side, then another, getting rid of the sleeping stiffness. "It's my twin sister," he confessed, seeing no way around it. _Haven't I told her that name before?_ "The last face I saw before they zapped me off to the prison world."

Bonnie slid the book back onto the bedside table and nodded. She wanted to pry and ask if what he was experiencing in his dreams was part of his Luke merge, but for now, she chose not to.

He turned to her and raised his eyebrows. "What time is it? I don't suppose we have too much to lounge around, anymore, do we?"

"Three and a half hours," she replied, checking her watch for confirmation, forcing herself to take it easy. She didn't want Kai unnecessarily straining himself when he was obviously zonked and still trying to shake off the magic issue. "You've time for tea. And a little more sleep if you feel you need it."

He did need it, but didn't want to try. Jo's contorted face with blood seeping between her teeth as she laughed was still there, too close to his skin. Kai needed no fresh colors on it.

She leaned back, extending an arm across the pillows, pointing within the direction of the table next to him. "I made you some a while ago. I thought it might warm you up. Which it probably won't now as it's icy cold."

Kai chuckled and squinted at her cunningly. "I've déjà vu. We've played that one through before. And, if I remember correctly, it's up to me to warm it back up." He slipped off the bed, eager to escape the room and her prying eyes, took the mug and strolled out.

"Well, no," she retorted quietly, watching as he climbed off the bed and headed for the door. She would have happily done it for him but he appeared to need to escape.

Bonnie lay on the bed for a bit, staring after him, giving him a cursory five minutes of the privacy and the time to work through his own lingering demons.

He set the tea on the counter and turned on the kettle, mulling over the dream, unable to stop himself. The vision kept playing and repeating itself. He could still hear her laugh and how deeply it reached inside him, as if it were a lance she put in his gut.

 _(You killed us.)_

What the hell was that supposed to mean? If it was her way of saying he ruined their family entirely – yes, he guessed he had. Not that they hadn't started it before he did, but no one really cared to backtrack. It was perfectly fine for all of them to believe Malachai was the bad seed and the problem rested solely in him. Wincing at a hint of sickness in the pit of his stomach, he turned the boiling kettle off and poured the scalding water into his tea, wishing to have something much stronger.

Bonnie looked around, easing off the oversized bed, to make sure Kai hadn't forgotten anything, and then made her way downstairs. Taking her time to do so, getting there just as Kai started pouring the hot water into the mug to top it up. She opened her mouth to let him know that if he wanted to talk about his dreams or anything else bothering him, that she didn't mind listening, and yet she didn't. She wasn't sure she wanted to or that she was ready to get that close to him. They had their bonding moments and those had been respectable, but what happened once they cracked back over to the real world? Bonnie still bore the scars and nothing really changed. It couldn't – not when it had taken sixty-two days to build.

She quietly reached down to pick up the bag that held their sandwiches and tea, things she'd thrown together as though they were going on a cute couple picnic. She moved toward the chair in front of the fireplace, set the bag on it next to her, and patiently waited for him to finish.

Kai sipped the hot tea, enjoying the warmth flowing down into his belly, and listened to Bonnie in the parlor. He was afraid she would come to the kitchen to keep an eye on him at all times as she tended to, but she didn't. Maybe, his escape was too obvious. He heaved a sigh and took another gulp, strolling slowly along the kitchen island. His eyes traveled idly around the kitchen and fell on a white spot in mostly brown surroundings. There was a book lying on the small table at the wall. Kai took a closer look and almost dropped the mug. A hot flash surged in him as he remembered the initial plan the Gilberts had when they wanted him to bring them over here. The atlas. The damn atlas.

Automatically, he lifted the mug to his lips, mulling over the possibilities. He could just leave it a secret – why not when they were about to move out and try again. It could work this time, without that rock. And if it didn't… Well, then they had a problem and a plan B would come in handy. If he told her now – did she trust him enough not to do anything behind his back? Not to leave him behind like he did her?

Kai wanted to think she wouldn't, but then he didn't really know. People changed, and they did so quicker under the circumstances like these. Bonnie might have changed a lot since he left her on his lawn in Portland bleeding with a beeper saying I LIED to prick her for her stubbornness when (and if) she woke up. And if he still had not noticed any such changes, it could have been merely delayed because she depended on his magic as well as he depended on her ability to wield it. This atlas was a free ticket out of here for her. With or without Kai.

He finished his tea, not at all amused by his reverie, and rinsed the mug. As he set it on the counter next to the sink, a wave of nausea rolled up to his throat, as sudden as a punch of an invisible bully, and morphed into a wrenching throe even quicker. He gasped soundlessly, propping his palms on the counter not to fall down. It felt as if someone grabbed his intestines, squeezed them in a fist and twirled it this way and that. Something whistled in his ears and a lightheaded feeling came over him as though he were dropping from a significant height. The world was about to slip away when the pain loosened. Kai stood for a few more moments, half-bent over the counter, breathing hungrily until he felt all right to straighten up. He wiped a few beads of sweat from his forehead. A comber of cold went down his back, like an ague fit. He saw Jo's awful grin. 'You will DIE.'

 _You're just a stupid dream, so shut up. Shut the fuck up!_

He took a deep breath, ignoring the alarmed inner voice yelling that it had to be wrong, very wrong. He cast a parting glance at the atlas, and went for the parlor, wearing a good-sport smile for Bonnie's benefit. "We better get moving if we don't wanna miss the train. Oh, and… don't forget the knife."


	11. Chapter 11

Bonnie glanced at her watch for what felt like the twentieth time in ten minutes and then laid her head back, relaxing upon the couch, legs lifted into position to try and relax. It wasn't long thereafter that he finally joined her, looking no better but wearing a smile nonetheless.

"We better get moving if we don't wanna miss the train. Oh, and… don't forget the knife."

"The knife?" she parroted, swinging her legs off the couch, feeling her stomach somersault intensely. That did not insight any kind of joy or eagerness in her. "You can't be serious?"

She jogged toward the kitchen anyway. Kai took her backpack from the chair and hauled one strap onto his shoulder, scanning the parlor with a quick eye to make sure they weren't forgetting anything important. The atlas stood out on the dark screen of his mind, and Kai stubbornly looked the other way. If he told her, she would clasp onto it, and they would have to wait, travel to the edge of the world for that damn thing – whatever it was – and then hope for the best. And that all in case she didn't screw him over the same way he did her. In Kai's book, people loved to get even and pay back the embarrassing and hurtful debts. Even a person as perfect in moral sense as Bonnie seemed to be – he couldn't bring himself to trust her goodness that much. Not yet. Not unless he had no other option.

Bonnie grabbed the knife off the dry rack, clutching it in her right hand once she got outside and caught up. He wasn't moving too fast.

"I know you have a particularly gruesome part two plan in mind. But I—I err… don't think it's a good idea to try and kill zap again."

Kai heaved a sigh, and stared at her with barely hidden tired irritation.

It wasn't that Bonnie didn't want to go home. But how was that going to legitimately work? Was she to kill him? Take his hand and hope for the best? There were so many things to complicate it. "You're not recovering as you thought you would and I think we should stick to what I have and hope for the best."

What was the worst case scenario? They sit out another day? The magic fades away altogether? That thought filled her with dread—almost making her wish she could retract her hesitation—as more likely scenarios flooded to the surface. What if he died and she still didn't make it? Where would she be then? Who would come for her again? Damon? He'd left her to rot here for two months already, how long would it take to get to her if Kai was gone entirely? She didn't want to think about it.

"We'll have a repeat of yesterday, and if you don't recall your reaction to that, let me resume that neither of us enjoyed it."

Bonnie could admit that she'd lost it, that once again that chance of escape had been snatched from her grasp and that he could relate, granted how many times she'd done it to him in the past.

"So I suggest you suck it up and we do it my way which seems to have more chances to get us out of here." Kai plucked the knife from her hand and tucked it into the backpack as he strode towards the woods. "You coming?"

Bonnie regarded him pensively as he went ahead. He'd only seen one way to do it and knew that she wouldn't help him. Bonnie had been so brave then, too, so uninformed of what she was getting into, so ignorant—with Damon's help—of what Kai was truly trying to escape. She _now_ knew.

They traveled to the caves in silence, neither happy about the cliffhanger of their fate. Bonnie straggled after him in silence, keeping an eye on him, registering how sluggish his walk was as opposed to what it was the day before. He put up a good front and radiated a fair amount of confidence, but she couldn't help but think his culpability was making it difficult for him to see what he was doing to himself. She respected his choice and in some way, selfishly, she was grateful. Bonnie averted her gaze to the invariable sky overhead, having come to loathe and take comfort in the eerie silence around them. There was no rain, no colder weather, no birds and zero land type animals to signify life outside of this world. It was purely a cold merciless and unfeeling copy.

She followed him down into the cave, watching him struggle, making sure to refrain from babying him any more than was necessary, not wanting to overstep her bounds.

They unpacked the ascendant and the knife, and Bonnie shot an acute glance at him that Kai pretended not to notice as he wrapped his fingers around the knife's handle, preparing himself for the final plunge. It was never easy enough, but now it appeared to get harder every time he did it to himself. Maybe because of how he hardly felt good and healthy, anymore, and any new addition to his discomforts seemed excessive. He hoped the fit he had earlier at the sink wouldn't come for a replay when the eclipse started.

As Kai removed the knife from her backpack and psyched himself up for the final blow, Bonnie couldn't help but notice the look of uncertainty that flickered on his face. He might have massacred his family, stabbed her and left her for dead, but the look she was reading on his features now was that of implicit fear and indecision. He didn't know what he was doing, he didn't know if this would work and was taking a chance – a fatal one. And in good conscience, she couldn't calmly sit back and let him maim himself. Not again. She didn't even have to murmur the spell this time. She was so worked up the knife simply wrenched itself from his weak grip, sliding across the ground to ricochet off a boulder, temporarily lost to our sight. She hardly paid mind to where it landed.

The knife escaped his hand so quick he hardly noted the very moment before it swept away from him across the stony ground and clanged against a stone somewhere ahead where he couldn't see. Kai stared dumbly in the direction it went, then snapped a what-the-hell glare at Bonnie.

"I'm sorry," she said as he turned to stare at her. "But I'm not going to let you kill yourself. You've given me what you can and we're going to make due." She walked over to him, reaching into the bag for the ascendant, using the sharper side of it—as she had done in the past—to slice into her palm. She squeezed her blood onto the center of the key, peering up at the sky where the sun was readying to be blanketed for a minute or three.

Kai watched her, uncertain of how he should feel, aggravated or grateful. Was she sympathizing or merely worried for her only source of magic in this world? What if she knew of Nova Scotia? Would her attitude change then? Would she still be willing to keep the team or rather make sure he stayed behind to never haunt her outside this place?

She uttered the words needed to unlock it, waiting, not wanting to waste any time, and extended a hand toward him. "You coming?" There was still a few more minutes to wait, but she wanted to be ready to leave as soon as.

Kai blinked and looked at her hand extended to him. Above them, the shadow was creeping towards the glaring eye of the sun. He nodded and took her hand, standing before her. There was a meek nauseating sensation around his stomach, and he could only hope nothing drastic would happen before they were out – IF they were out at all. She hardly had enough magic; Kai couldn't make himself believe she did no matter how hard he tried. It was going to be another epic failure, and another nervous breakdown back at home. It struck him bitterly funny how he thought of the Boardinghouse as home. It also smelled ominous, as if that damn house truly was about to become their last home for eternity.

Bonnie closed her eyes and started to chant as the light gradually dimmed upon her pretty face; the shadows from her hair and eyelashes shifting faster across her cheeks. Kai peered at the blood painting the center of the ascendant and felt no elated anticipation of going home.

 _Because we're not going home._

Bonnie guided Kai's one hand beneath her own as she'd done for Damon in the past, showing him how to hold the ascendant with her—not that she knew—and took a firm hold of his other hand. She peered up at the sky, making sure the moon was shifting into place and starting to cover the sun as it had done so many times over the last six months. She took a moment to pray that nothing else go wrong and closed her eyes. She needed to make this count – for the both of them.

She reflectively tightened her hold on his hand as a breeze picked up around them the more in tune she became with the spells momentum, filling her with inherent excitement that soon turned into that of anticipation the longer that brilliant beam took to make itself known.

The twilight embraced them and dipped the caves around them in abyss-like dark. A breeze rose and breathed around them, blew Bonnie's hair and tickled the nape of his neck. Gooseflesh broke on his back and arms, nausea strengthened. He could almost feel a few beads of sweat about to stand out on his temples as if he had fever. He actually was feeling feverish. He noticed his bones aching, all through his legs and spine. Kai shivered as if with a chill. And then there was a kiss of cold on his cheek. Bonnie was still chanting, her voice lower now, saving energy. Colors danced over her face as if on a disco party. Small white flakes fell between and over them. Snow. It was snowing.

Kai tried to look up and glimpsed a shining rainbow before a white flash of pain in his brain stole the view. He cried out, staggering back and clutching at his head. A few throes, and then it loosened, as suddenly as it began. He slumped onto his knees and against a rock, catching his breath.

Bonnie kept trying, kept preserving the word right until the minute I no longer could. Kai cried out, his hands vanishing from her own as he staggered back to clutch his head. She opened her eyes, staring at him as he slumped against a rock before darting a glance heavenward. They weren't in their part of the world anymore. They were back in rainbow hell.

She was there, saying or asking something Kai didn't care to focus on just yet. It was still dark around – or it was in his head, he couldn't tell. A short charge of ache zapped through his head without warning, having him groan, but he managed to see the colors flicker off replaced by the normal semi-dark of the eclipse, as if they were a hologram.

Bonnie rushed toward Kai, taking a clumsy but gentle hold of his shoulder, hoping the ascendant would still kick in and carry them home. It didn't.

"No," she whispered in distress, watching as once again the world faded away like a macabre picture painting and bestowed them with the tail end of the eclipse.

She stood beside him in silence, uncertain of what to say, unable to believe they had failed. It should have worked, she felt it, the small inkling of a jolt as it tried to take effect.

 _I was sure of it._

Kai raised his hands to his temples – each weighed a few extra pounds – and rubbed gently, his eyes closed. Then looked at Bonnie. "You didn't have enough magic to pull it off before it went unstable again. You shouldn't have stopped me. We'd be out of here by now if you didn't." His voice held no accusation; it was tired and listless, just like he felt.

Bonnie stiffened and glanced down at the bloodied ascendant in her hand, feeling a lick of irritation creep beneath the surface, along with resentment. Why hadn't Damon tried to come for them? Why were they doing this alone? It had been three days since Kai arrived—free of threats—and with him being good, Liv might care to try again? Or were they resigning Bonnie to her fate? Were they giving up on both of them?

"I stopped you because it was the right thing to do," she replied insistently and removed her hand from his shoulder, taking her place beside him on the rock. "Because had we not made it, you'd still be dead and we'd still be suffering with the same issue. You've done enough in the sacrificial department. And as useful as it feels, you're of more value to me alive than dead." She slid the ascendant into her bag, her eyes once more finding his, a pang of sympathy clutching her heart at how off-color he looked. How close to death.

 _If only there was a way to figure out what's wrong with him._

She removed the water bottle she'd tucked into her bag, screwed off the cap and offered it to him, he looked as though he needed it. What were they going to do now?

Her words lured, and Kai distantly wondered whether she cared for the magic source or _him_. He nodded a thanks for the water and drank.

"We need to find out what's wrong with you, there must be something," she mused aloud, folding her arms across her chest.

Kai thought there sure was. Something big and ugly. Though he was scarcely ready to learn what and how big this something ugly was because it meant to chain him to this place for the real eternity this time.

"What if we go back to Portland?" she asked. "It's two or three days drive away. Maybe you family will have something on record? Something to explain this place? Or more?"

He put the bottle in her hand and looked at her with tired pessimism. "Bonnie, I've spent eighteen years in this hole. Don't you think I've checked everything that could be checked? Tried everything that could be tried or researched or thought of. The prison worlds are the biggest secret of our coven; no one ever kept records of anything that touched upon how they tick. It's like placing the prison's plan in the open where the inmate can find it."

"But," Bonnie started in a whisper, wanting to remind him that her grandmother was a part of this whole thing somehow, that she'd willingly handed over her blood to lock him away. Perhaps his family didn't keep a record of these things—although that might have been similar—but Bonnie's was entirely different, and now that she knew there was a link, she could look into it, dig around and see what else those inheritance books have in them.

She meant good, and had any right to suggest solutions, but it still slipped a seed of irritation inside Kai where it started to grow. Nothing seemed to have a point now. He got up, waited out a bout of lightheadedness, and started to leave. "Let's go back. It's over."

Whereas Bonnie had been the one to lose it yesterday, today appeared to be his turn and for once, she had no words of hope or means of comfort. She took one last sip of water, screwed the bottle cap on and slipped it back into her backpack. She trailed behind him, making sure Kai wouldn't break an ankle on the way up, knowing that in his weakened state anything was possible and that unconsciousness loomed all the closer.

 _I can't afford to have him get stuck down here._

The more strength Kai put into making it out of the caves without slipping or stumbling, the more irritated he felt. It was ridiculous how tired he was, and he hadn't been unloading a train of coal or spring-cleaning the Boardinghouse. It had been a mere walk in the woods. It was unreal, and stupid. He felt stupid for letting Bonnie get in the way, and for believing it would be that easy to escape this place. More bitterness leaked from the thought of how he probably should have stayed out instead of sticking his nose back because of the freaking guilt. He _did_ escape. And then—

"So," she began once they made it to the surface and slowly walked back to the Boardinghouse. There was no longer a need to rush. "What do we do next?"

He chuckled, a dry and acrimonious sound, and nursed the urge to spin and shout in her face that there was nothing we could do since she made sure to strangle the only idea that worked.

"Killing you is no longer an option, I'm running on limited magic and it needs to be reserved. How else can we go about finding out what's wrong with you?" He had to have some kind of clue, right? Unlike her, he grew up amidst this kind of thing, he had some kind of base to work with.

"I'm a merged witch, my DNA's different, and that's what's wrong with me," he said, trying to keep the aggravation out of his voice, and afraid she'd catch up and touch him and then he'd throw her against a tree.

Bonnie guessed it was his turn to feel angry and despondent about their failure. Not that she blamed him. He'd tasted freedom and all but lost it because of a good deed.

"Maybe that's the great lesson of this place – that I should suffer in any way possible. Then maybe I should keep killing myself until this whole crap of a scheme clicks right for at least a damn minute. We never get to take notice, but in fact, a minute is quite a nice time. So much can happen within a damn minute. Like, teleporting the hell OUTTA HERE."

"Or maybe, I should attempt to get a message to Damon," she said, not at all liking the prospect of his whole lets-kill-me shenanigans and aware of how against that idea he'd been the first time she presented it. It seemed fitting now, especially with that little magic she had left – it wouldn't get them back home, definitely not.

Kai felt the flames of wrath work their way through him, roaring the damned name like the bloodthirsty crowd was roaring Jesus's once, demanding his death.

"He can talk to your sister and they help give us a boost. The ascendant should still be there, right? Like when we teleport, it stays this side. Wouldn't the same apply on the other side? Wouldn't it still be in the Boardinghouse? I know you said you broke it or whatever, but you got it working again, maybe they could use it to come get us."

He spun around to face her, a furious smile on his face. "Yeah, why don't we text Damon? Wonderful idea!" He patted his pockets in a mocking flourish and composed a shocked expression. "But wait, I've no cell on me. Probably left it in the real world. What a bummer. How about you? Got some fancy futuristic model that can call through realities, don't you? By all means, go ahead and send a message, and we shall see how many years it takes him to tear his mouth from the Gilbert gal and read it."

Bonnie bristled, hating how he made that sound, as if searching for her had somehow become a chore and that it wasn't what Damon was doing to begin with.

"I get it, you don't like Damon," she responded, forcing herself to remain neutral and refrain from asking him to explain what he meant. "And I'm not asking you too. I just—if he knows we're ready, if I can get a message to him, we'll be out of here in no time. It took your sister, like what—a day? There doesn't have to be a wait, there doesn't have to be any more bloodshed or… hopelessness."

Her faith in Damon and his creative mind put to her rescue was sickening to the core, as well as flabbergasting. "You seriously believe either of my sisters would help us? They would be happy to leave you here to rot if they know I'm locked away again as well. We won't be 'out of here in no time', Bonnie! We won't get out unless it's something WE do, do you understand?"

She understood full well the point Kai was trying to make as she'd been trying to get herself out of situations from day one. And from what she knew, Damon, for whatever reason, over the years, became one of the only other people she could count on to get her out of it, even before he became bearable and a really close friend. That was why it hurt so much to know that he'd left her here, that it had been two months and counting since he'd left and she had sent him Miss Cuddles.

"No one else will help, and certainly not your hero Damon. All he cared about was Elena, and now she's in his arms, in his bed. Where _you_ are doesn't bug his mind as often as you might think."

Just saying it, throwing those few drops of poison into her crystal-clear well of hope felt good. It felt addictive. Kai searched her face for the mood to argue his point. He almost needed her to give him a reason to say more.

"You're wrong," Bonnie stated, feeling irked by his obvious need to discredit Damon and take his foul mood out on her. She didn't care. She wouldn't stand for it. "He's fought for me in the past and now that—that we're closer, friends even." Another—more illicit—image popped into her head, an inkling of unwarranted hurt stirring at the thought of being abandoned by him, of being disregarded so effortlessly once he'd acquired what he wanted. "He wouldn't just leave me here. He obviously hasn't the resources or the way to get to me."

If before that Kai was trying to rule himself down despite the annoyance, now all restraints went up in flames of fury at her stubborn devotion to a man she hardly meant much to. Kai wanted to crush her believe in him, rip it out and burn it to ashes as she watched. He needed to make her see how foolish she was. And also, a small, deep-dwelling part of him wanted to hurt her in return.

Kai wanted to yell and rage, but instead he squinted searchingly at her as if something new had occurred to him. "You thought after that night he'd be your white knight in armor who'd rescue you from your tower and bring you to his palace to crown the Queen?"

Bonnie stiffened at his subtle and cold mention of 'that night', his laugh sending a sharp buzz up her spine that made her recoil slightly in response.

He barked a laugh. "It's like you never met the guy, Bonnie! Elena's his everything, always was, and seems to always be. I bet he'd do anything to keep that little piece of information as far from her as possible. And guess what you are? You're the walking-talking reminder of the exact thing he's working hard on forgetting – you're a mistake, a drunken comfort-sex slip."

She flinched at his cavalier mention of _sex_ , flushing in response to the knowledge, hating how easily it fell from his tongue and how effortlessly he'd cheapened the entire thing.

"If you stayed here forever, it might suit his harmony with Elena just fine. So what makes you so sure he wants you back and around them?"

Bonnie swallowed thickly and reached to launch into a defense, to let Kai know that they were 'friends' and that over the last few months Damon had grown and changed. Kai didn't allow her that chance, clearly reading the intention in her eyes and looking as though he were a predator about to take down its prey. She wasn't fond of that look.

One didn't have to be a mind reader to see it hit the target. It soothed his heart with acrimonious joy, and Kai aimed again to make it a between-the-eyes one.

"Before I dropped by the Boardinghouse with that letter for Jo, neither of them sought me," he told her in a calmer tone, as if expecting that his facts would comfort her. "And even then it was Elena's idea to try and contact you. You know what they were busy with? They threw you a birthday party. A birthday party without the birthday girl. Cute as can be. It seemed to me like rather a memorial than that. They were saying goodbye to you without voicing it out loud. I thing only Caroline still grasped at straws. Damon certainly didn't."

Bonnie stared at him in mute shock, at a loss on how to even come up with a thought that could assimilate how sick she all of a sudden felt. While she was losing it, trying to grasp onto the last strip of her tilting sanity, they were throwing a party in her honor?

Kai was unyielding. "You know what else I think? That if he wanted you back so badly, he would've gotten more Bennett blood like the last time, sought me out, and made me do it whatever the cost. But he was all over Elena all day every day, even on your birthday when I walked in on them. I might've interrupted a kitchen quickie on the table, next to the cupcakes they made for your party. You should've seen his grimace when he had to keep it in his pants instead."

Bonnie guessed they were making up for lost time. She couldn't blame him, could she? And yet, some part of her did, some part of her wanted to rage, kick and scream. If she were in Damon's position, she'd have been working on a solution night and day, doing everything in her limited power to find a way to bring him back and make this work.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, Bonnie, but he fucked you just because you were there when he needed the only calm pill that worked for him when booze did not. It wasn't _you_ he wanted. And now he's doing what he's perfect at, given the amount of horrid deeds on his conscience: he's working hard to avoid thinking about it, or you, if he can help it. A true hero in a nutshell."

"And how would you know that?" she spat, unable to bite her tongue anymore, her right hand sweeping out to send him careening against the nearest tree in spite of his ailment. He'd hurt her, she wanted to hurt him back. Bonnie moved to stand in front of him, ignoring his grimace of discomfort. She just wanted to make him stop. "You don't know him. You don't know what's going on in that unpredictable mind of his, or how we feel about one another for that matter! Relationships take work, effort and a semblance of trust. I trust him and I trust that he has done everything he can to help me. If, for some reason, he's stopped and if, for some reason, he is taking a break in his research or hunting mission, then it is simply a means to tackle the next step. If there is one thing I know about Damon, it's that when he sets his mind to something, he doesn't give up."

Which hurt all the more. Why was she still stuck here? Why hadn't he thought to find a way to get Kai to help him before her birthday? What had been so dire that Damon had forgotten her?

Though Kai knew she would fight and resist and be at her very top of stubborn about it, he still could scarcely believe his ears. He stared at her, gobsmacked, unable to believe she let things he said fly right through while she stuck to her guns.

"And he won't give up on me," she accentuated as though she needed to make that point, sparing Kai one last look as she stomped her way to the house. Wishing, as she drew nearer, that Damon would be waiting for them – _for her_.

When she released him abruptly and hurried away towards the Boardinghouse, Kai felt both sorry and glad he couldn't use magic, otherwise the urge to send a fireball into her back would have been too much.

"Run ahead and see for yourself, why don't you?" he yelled after her, grimacing as his temples throbbed with the harbinger of what promised to be a nasty headache. "I'm sure he's waiting for you there, with flowers and chocolates, ready to sweep you away and never let go." His lips pulled back, baring his teeth in a snarl, as he smacked a fist into the tree. A lace of pain thrust through his hand and arm, but he barely noticed. His temples gave another sickening throb. He sat heavily against the trunk, working on controlling his breathing.

After a while, he scrambled to his feet, and headed back to Chez Salvatore.

Bonnie eased into a jog, needing to put as much distance between them as she possibly could.

How did Kai even know about what happened between Damon and her? Had he seen all of it? How had he managed to camouflage himself?

She was sweating like a pig by the time she reached the Boardinghouse. "Damon?!" she called, doing so without shame, knowing that Kai would take his time to get here. "Elena?!" she bellowed for extra measure, assuming she'd made the return trip with him. Bonnie got no response to either name. She guessed Kai was right. She walked through the house anyway, making sure nothing was disturbed and that there weren't any messages on the fridge.

"Fuck!" she shouted, giving up on her exploration, hating that fact that Kai was right. She picked up the nearest vase and threw it upon the floor. In four months, you'd think that Damon and she would have had nothing to talk about, but for weeks, he'd kowtowed to intrusive questions about his family, their rich tastes and which art he was most fond of. She'd enjoyed each tale and came to learn every item in this house had a story.

And in her rage, she destroyed a few of them.

It was only as Bonnie ran out of things to throw against the bookshelf or to smash upon the wooden flooring that she stopped to observe the littered study. She didn't even wipe her tears as she wearily walked out of the room, feeling drained, purposely avoiding the parlor in case Kai had returned, to go in search of some wine in the kitchen. She climbed the stairs, pulling her shirt off before she'd even reached the top of the landing, throwing it toward the clothes basket near the bathroom door. She set the bottle down on the edge of the mattress, unlaced her boots and kicked them off, shedding the last of her clothes before heading into the bathroom—wine in hand—to spend a couple of hours soaking away her problems. /

It was quiet in the house, and Kai didn't mind. They both wanted to see each other the least. He snatched a bottle of brandy from the kitchen's shelf, opened it, and tilted to his lips for a few swallows, one after another. They burned and almost stole his breath, but he wanted it to burn and hurt. So it kept his mind from straying and sniffing on things he better left out of sight. He told her what she had to know, and he didn't have to remember it or mull it over. It was her turn to mull. Kai felt done and wasted. He took another swallow and dragged himself to the parlor, where he lit the fireplace and settled on the floor with his back against the side of the couch, and drank, watching the flames.

After a while, rather than inspiring meditation without thoughts, fire made him mull over the quarrel with Bonnie over Damon. His name rang in Kai's tipsy head yelled in her voice and peppered with her arguments that wouldn't stand in court of reality had she tried to think logically over what he'd said. But no, it was much easier to keep grasping at her Damon life-belt as if Kai were here by chance. Or because Damon had sent him.

Which he had not.

Absolutely not. It was Kai's idea and his personal sacrifice. He wasn't opposed to dying to mend at least a part of what he did to her here. No one commanded him to do it. No one had any power of such kind over him. It was his decision.

 _Then why are you trying to convince yourself of that if you know it for a fact?_

Kai winced and drank, unable to stop his mind from replaying Bonnie's lines

 _(I trust him and I trust that he has done everything he can to help me)_

and that desperate, to the level of panic, expression glowing on her face,

 _(And he won't give up on me)_

the need to believe in the words leaving her mouth and ringing in her ears, or otherwise she would lose it. It shook Kai to the core. Holding the bottle up a little by its neck, he waved it, sloshing the inch of brandy still remaining, and thought of how bad that need of her was. How it was the only thread, on which she still hung, and Kai tried to scissor it.

He washed down the small pill of guilt with the last swallow of the liquor and dropped the bottle on the floor. It rolled slowly away from him on a slanted course between the fireplace and a bar table. He refused to feel guilty about anything connected to Damon. It wasn't fair. None of what she said was.

Kai got up on unsteady feet and went in the direction he recalled was a library or a study. He wasn't sleepy as he hoped to be after boozing it up, and figured he had to try a book to yank his mind from all things Bonnie and her pet vampire freak.

The study looked like an aftermath of a hurricane – named Bonnie, he presumed – that had had a few minutes of fun in it. Observing the debris of a few vases and statuettes, he could see her raging, probably with tears spilling over, her lips pulled back in a grimace of both profound hurt and wrath.

Wrath for Kai that should have been directed at Damon.

Kai tasted copper in his mouth and realized he had bitten into the inside of his lip too hard; his hands unwittingly balled into fists. He had forgotten all about the books and sleep and distraction. He wouldn't mind crashing a few items himself, but he stood where he did, stewing in emotions he wasn't sure how to calm.

In the back of his mind, he realized faintly that her breaking things Damon was blowing dust off could have been – was, definitely was – a manifestation of at least some of what Kai had said hitting home. She was frustrated with Damon, too, for still being stuck here while he wasn't, and she let it out on his things, things that were important for him – things she associated him with. But it did nothing to lift Kai's level in comparison to the vampire's in her eyes. So, in the end of the day, it didn't matter. Nothing really did. She was too fixed on Kai being the worst and Damon being the best, and that was it.

It was final.

Kai spun around and left the study, strode hurriedly through the parlor and out of the house. Outside, he ran.

The liquor section was clean and untouched, unlike in his memories where he brought Damon to his knees and then to his belly, like a guilty dog, in the pool of vervained bourbon. He wished to rewind back, to thrust that wooden stick into the vampire's heart this time, and see his eyes dim.

Kai gnashed his teeth together, snatched a bottle of brandy, and went away without looking back. He smashed in the driver's window in a Ford Explorer parked on the store's lot with his elbow, opened the door and swept the glass off the seat before slipping in and pulling the door closed. The glass pleasantly crunched under his boots. He tugged the wires from under the dashboard, picked the needed and connected them. The engine rumbled softly. He pulled out from the lot and stepped the accelerator into the floor, relishing in the wind blowing over his flushed face, soothing and hurting at the same time. He liked the speed with which the black band of the road disappeared under the hood as though eaten by it. He liked the fogginess in his head, hanging there like a veil of mist that hid the shadows and sharp angles. He needed it, something to numb him. Something to cast the thoughts away, leaving just the whistling wind in his ears.

Kai brought the bottle to his lips, gulped, and sped up. A small smile touching the corners of his mouth.


	12. Chapter 12

Bonnie reluctantly rolled out of bed when the pressure on her bladder became too much. After all, she had finished off last night's wine and slept for a couple of hours. When she was finished, she pulled on a pair of white cotton pants with and a purple tank, slipped her feet into a pair of flip-flops, moisturized a little to buy herself some time, and lazily ran a brush through her hair. She wasn't particularly thrilled about making her way out of her makeshift cave, not when she was still mad at Kai for what he'd said and avoiding the mess she'd made in the study. Where did he come off assuming to know their relationship? And what gave him the right to even think he could somehow diminish it? And why did it hurt so damned much?

Bonnie shook off her thoughts and exhaled softly. She only hoped Kai was asleep downstairs when she got there. She'd feel better—far more responsive—if they tackled things fresh tomorrow.

Before she left the room, Bonnie pulled her bed's quilt straight, tossed the towel to dry on a chair and picked up the notepad she'd used to write a letter to Damon. She hadn't sent it, deciding at last minute to hold back, pondering if it were a waste of her magic – of Kai's magic. She involuntarily read over the words with a ration of dejection and distain, snapping it shut angrily, tossing it toward her desk as she headed for the door.

She made her way down slowly, scanning the foyer, straining her ears to listen for any noise or indication of where he could be. When she heard none, she hunted for him.

She visited the parlor first, then the TV lounge, the study, the kitchen and even the backyard. All she managed to come across was a discarded bottle in the parlor. She clutched it to her chest like a lifesaver, feeling an inkling of hysteria kick in. The fire was on, dying out since no one was there to stoke it, but still on – it meant he'd made it from the forest. But where did he go? Why wasn't he here and why didn't he at least tell her he was leaving?

'The same reason you didn't want to talk to him, Bonnie', she chided herself internally. 'He needs space. He'll come back. Where else could he go?'

She grimaced at the prospect of him somehow fleeing, of maybe getting caught up in the wishy-washy crack his whacked-out fever was the driving force behind.

 _What if he is hurt?_

"Kai?!" she called, bottle swinging at her side as she rushed for the downstairs bathroom, it was the one of the two other places she hadn't checked. Damon's room was the other.

She lifted a hand to her mouth as she emerged from Damon's room, gnawing at a nail in consideration, making a sweep of the other guest rooms.

He was nowhere to be found. She checked the garage last. All the cars were still there. She opened the garage door, slipped into the driver's seat of Damon's car and decided to drive around. Not that she was sure where he'd be, but maybe he decided on a pub? A dance setting? An arcade place? He liked music, right? Maybe he went in search of something to take his mind off their shitty day and was holed up somewhere entertaining himself?

'Or maybe,' an evil, more insecure part of herself stirred to life as she started the engine and pulled from the garage, 'he, too, has had enough and decided to abandon you.'

 _They all eventually do._

* * *

After the brandy level in the bottle dipped below the half, the driving started to seem less real and more like a video game simulator. A very _authentic_ one and yet something detached from him. It was a fun thought to toy with, and Kai let out a laugh between the gulps, letting that impression linger and deepen its roots. With the liquor drooping towards the bottom of the bottle, he finally realized he was sleepy as hell. All of a sudden, his eyelids weighed a ton each, and all he wanted was to let them close for at least a few seconds. The wind through the broken window was good on his feverish skin, making the fire within him bearable. It also coaxed to give in to slumber.

The road ahead seemed straight, and there was a forest starting ahead, he noted groggily. The sun was beginning its way downward and hung to the right of his car like a glaring eye of God, peeking into the salon every now and then, burning the side of his face unpleasantly. Every time it flickered on the dashboard or a side-view mirror, Kai squinted, all the more eager to let his eyes close.

The forest ahead framed the road like a magical tunnel, a secret path to some dark kingdom of whimsical fairies or demons that had lain a trap to swallow the racing-to-nowhere Ford Explorer with him behind the wheel. Kai heard another laugh slip his lips, watching as the slightly blurry mass rushed towards the car.

He didn't notice how the almost empty bottle slipped out of his right hand that held it propped loosely against his thigh. He failed to notice how his eyes didn't open after the next blink. By the time Ford Explorer flung itself into a tree instead of taking a rather tough turn, Kai was fast asleep and blissfully dreamless.

* * *

Bonnie turned on the radio and flipped over the tape inside to listen to side B of the short list of nineties hits, softly singing along with Paula Abdul. She needed to remain calm.

There was absolutely no reason to flip out. Kai couldn't leave. He was stuck here as much as she was. What had she been thinking all those months ago when she proposed they stay?

She stopped outside The Grill and took a look inside, next was a bar at the end of town, a movie theater in the middle and a video store toward the main road.

By the time she stopped outside Mystic Falls one and only grocery store, she had flipped the tape a second time and was no longer choking out her own renditions. She hated feeling helpless. She hated that she couldn't call him and that he'd simply taken off without a word. The jerk!

She walked into the grocery store, her stomach rumbling as she spotted a loaf of bread. She hadn't eaten in over eight hours and before they had left. Bonnie walked past a till, grabbed a plastic bag and helped herself to some junk food. Chips, two chocolates, muffins and a can or two of Coke. She needed a pick-me-up, something to work the liquor from her system.

She walked toward the liquor aisle, driven by wistfulness and some odd sense of comfort. There wasn't a day when Damon was around and they were shopping that they didn't stop here. He was always drinking, always seeking that numbness. It didn't always work.

She guessed that was why he tried so many different options and why they had caved to weakness.

She exhaled deeply, strolling down the aisle, plucking free a rum and screwing off the top, intending to take a sip when she noticed there was a bottle missing from the brandies.

She set it down, fingering the open space, a slow smile spreading on her lips.

"Kai?!" she called, whirling around, the bottle forgotten as she headed for the home-furnishing section of the store and where he'd first made himself known. She almost expected Kai to be seated in the colorful beach lounger, grinning and chiding her for her stupidity.

"Answer me, you bastard," she commanded in an ire-filled whisper. He wasn't there and nothing looked disturbed. "Dammit," she hissed, hitting out at the nearest furnishing, kicking over a nearby container of pink flamingoes. Who even bought this?!

She stared down at the scattered decoration, plopping down on the end of the lounger, reaching into the plastic bag dangling from her arm to rip open the packet of chips. She was halfway to finishing when she rose to her feet, spotting something useful, something she should have used from the get-go. A map!

Bonnie plucked one from the shelf, unfolded and smoothed it out on the patio table in the middle of the room. She found a candle, a knife, and before long was casting a locator spell – using magic and her desperation to find him as the anchor.

It worked and before long she was back on the road, heading out of town with her snacks and a new map in case she needed to try again.

She had flipped the cassette three times and stopped to fill up the car once, making sure she wouldn't break down on the side of the road. There was no one else to call for help if she did. It was as she approached the point that had been shown on the map that she started to worry. It was in the middle of nowhere and pitch-black, Bonnie could hardly see anything.

Her heart stopped when in her tireless search she in due course came across a car, one she'd never noticed before and almost hoped was part of the prison world. She acknowledged it from its place outside the store in Mystic Falls, smoke rising off the engine, the backlights blood red and solid as though someone was sitting on the brakes. Bonnie pulled up behind the wreck, using her headlights to see, and dashed for the driver's door. She gasped upon seeing the damage, the door somewhat crunched up. She yanked it open with a flip of the wrist, stepping inside of it and immediately took Kai's face into her hands, blood running from a cut on the top of his head, a cut made by the windshield's glass.

"Kai," she said with desperation, trying to coax him into consciousness, too afraid to move him in fear he might have been really injured. "Kai! Open your eyes. Kai!"

He didn't respond.

She released his bloodied face and eyed the steering wheel. She didn't like how close it appeared to his body. Bonnie pressed a hand to his chest to keep him in the chair, securing him there. "Phasmatus subcinctus," she murmured.

The chair abruptly rolled back as she tried to make space, allowing her the chance to try and help him out of the front seat. She struggled, unsure of how to grip him, and then conceded to further use of magic, afraid of jostling him. She strained as she did and set him down in front of Damon's car so that she could see in the light.

He was awake now—he had stirred when she moved him—but struggled to breathe. She crouched down beside him, wincing as he groaned—a sound riddled with discomfort. She took his hand, aware of the distinct smell of alcohol in the air now that she was away from the engine's smoke. What made him think drinking and driving was a good idea?

"I thought you were smarter than this," she chided, peering down at him, his eyes still closed, his mouth parted slightly as he struggled to inhale. He must have punctured a lung. "What the hell were you thinking?"

She moved to push aside his shirt, wincing as she took in the unsightly black and blue bruise across his abdomen, his ribcage undoubtedly cracked. Bonnie gently laid her free hand upon the injury, closed her eyes, chanting softly with resolve, casting a similar spell she'd used on Elena all those years ago to help abate of his pain and to draw it into me. She gasped softly as her bones tweaked, attempting to replicate the injury and mend his trauma.

She wasn't sure if she would be able to heal him completely, but a little problem shared was better than nothing. That was what her grandmother had taught her as a kid.

* * *

"Apparently words are never enough for you. I'll teach you how to never try it again."

His voice rolled inside Kai's throbbing head like thunder while a hideous, wrenching agony was eating his arms, bones breaking in new places at every flick of his father's hand clawing the air.

"No… please… st— … stop… ple—please… Dad…" His pleas came out in wheezing croaks, his throat too sore from screaming. Kai was writhing on the floor, the crunching of his own bones deafening him along with blood beating and flushing in his temples. The world was made of pain and sounds, and his brain was about to explode every time a new bone snapped in hid forearm, or in a finger.

"You made me do it," Kai heard him say through a thick pillow of torture, he was too far away and yet close enough to get him. Like some vicious ancient God, the one demanding human sacrifices to spare his subjects a volcano eruption or a lightning strike. "You never listen, but I'll make you remember this. You give me no other choice."

"Don't… You're… killing me…" Kai almost added Dad to it, but then it suddenly occurred to him it was exactly what Dad was doing. Killing him. The best solution. And someone who was killing his fourteen-year-old kid could not be called Dad. Not by the one who was being killed, at least. It was a crazy idea, and Kai felt his busting brain could not contain it. Another bout of agony kicked him with hot, liquid pain flooding his arms and scorching the crushed bones and veins in them. It seeped into his chest, collecting there in a puddle of heavy liquefied metal, scalding and pressing him into the hard floor. He could no longer writhe, nor breathe, and with a faint relief (an absurd feeling in this situation, but it came nonetheless) Kai realized the darkness around him was thickening. Soon enough it would stop it all.

Somewhere in another universe, he heard screams. His father's voice roared over them, overlapping. One of them was Jo. She was closer than Mom who had probably put herself between her husband and son. Jo was at her brother' side, and Kai heard her sobs before the darkness took him.

* * *

Bonnie underwent as much of his pain as she possibly could handle, and then steadily released him. He had injured himself too badly, there was nothing else she could do. He would die.

He mumbled something, something she strained to hear at first and became clearer in the eerily quiet night.

 _"… stop… ple—please… Dad… Don't… You're… killing me…"_

She eased onto her backside next to him, oblivious of the dirt and blood that clung to her white cotton pants as she combed her fingers through his hair. He was suffering another nightmare. This time in relation to his father. Perhaps that was who he was running from? It was something to talk about and something that made her curious as Bonnie stared down into his pale features. She heaved a small sigh, tears collecting in her eyes as she attempted to put him at ease, praying that whatever injury he had sustained during his accident would take him swiftly and that soon he'd be on the road to recovery. She didn't move him, didn't even attempt to address him anymore, simply sitting beside him, tentatively nursing her own wounds, all too aware they'd fade with time or once he died.

That was the way of magic.

The sooner Kai was out and could no longer feel anything, the sooner she would get them to the nearest town, which, if Bonnie remembered correctly from the map, was Kilmarnock. They could stay there overnight and when he was ready – make their way back.

* * *

She drove along the gravel road and stopped outside a large hotel called the 'The tide inn'. It was eerie stopping at these places but it was the first on the way into town. She pulled to a stop right outside the front door and where it would be easier to carry his body inside. She familiarized herself with the place, hunted for a key and found a ground floor bedroom.

She slipped Kai inside with some struggle, no longer using her magic, feeling it drain on her from her earlier overuse, and settled him onto one of the single beds. There were two, and she claimed another for half-an-hour rest. Bonnie stared at him in thought, wondering why he had done something so stupid or if maybe—in her haste and annoyance—she'd missed how much pain he was in.

 _Is that why he's gotten shitfaced and ultimately killed himself for the third time? I hope not._

She rose off the mattress to take her mind off things, closing the door behind her as she went to take a look around the hotel, considering the notion of locking it in case he woke up and decided to leave again. She didn't. And nor would she allow herself to believe that he wouldn't be coming back. Not again. Not this time. He would. He _had_ to.


End file.
